Transition = Facing Change Head-On!Sýnishorn

THE FOG

We flew off to San Diego, where I would live for the next few months trying to decide what was next in my life. I am so blessed that I have children that welcomed me into their home.

It was great because all my kids were with me that first Holiday without Dan. That was a blessing, but inside I knew if I didn’t learn to stand on my own two feet, I would never realize who I was deep inside.

The transition was bearing down on me big time! I never lived alone, never. At age 72, I would discover if I had the inner strength to move forward. I honestly second-guessed myself, or should I say, the enemy was making me think I couldn’t do it.

After months of living in a thick fog, I began to see some light. When a person is in grief, I honestly believe God drops the person into a state of fog. It is like a shield of protection. Our minds are so full of loss that it is difficult to make clear decisions. I felt like my life was on autopilot as each day passed by. I looked for things to keep me busy. I formed a private group for widows on Facebook. I began writing notes and letters to widows who were not on FB.

God was helping me find purpose.

I always felt my only purpose was being a wife, mother, and grandmother. Now that Dan was gone and my kids and grandkids were grown, I was facing the transition of not only loss but facing myself. Who am I?

“But the Lord is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one.” 2 Thessalonians 3:3

When we are in grief, we are also vulnerable to temptation and the enemy of our souls. If we become bitter about the loss and do not lean on God, we open our vessel to all kinds of wrong decisions.

I had called my brother to ask if I could stay with him & his wife while I searched for a home, and they welcomed me. I got brave enough to investigate booking a flight back east. Once I booked a ticket, I knew there would be no turning back. I shared with my family, that I would be leaving in mid-April. I knew God was with me!