Choosing Forgiveness Sýnishorn

Forgiveness is a flow.

The biggest misconception people have about forgiveness is that it’s this huge, one-time event that negates any wrong that was done. The truth is, forgiveness is a flow – a continuous process of extending grace that is meant to be implemented into your everyday life, like brushing your teeth. When you’re brushing and flossing every day, a trip to the dentist doesn’t feel as intimidating, right? The same is true with forgiveness.

When someone wrongs you or you become offended, whether it was a small infraction like something said during an argument or a more malicious act, it’s reasonable to be hurt. By definition, an act of injustice is unfair, and our response leans toward evening the playing field. We want the other person to receive what we think they deserve, and we want to receive what we think we deserve. However, as Christians, we are called to forgive.

Many of us are like Peter in Matthew 18, wanting to know how many times we must forgive. How many isolated events until we can say enough is enough? Will seven times do it? Jesus responds by saying, “Seventy times seven.” In other words, take your one-time events and multiply them. Break them down into smaller pieces and you’ll be able to extend more forgiveness.

Our commitment to continuous forgiveness mirrors God’s covenant with His people. In Genesis 17, God clarifies that His “everlasting” covenant stretches beyond Abraham to “your descendants after you for the generations to come.” He promises to be the God of Abraham and the God of his descendants after him. It’s not an isolated event or a one-time declaration. We see it over and over again in scripture as God repeats Himself. Regardless of how many times we wander away or offend God, His promise and His forgiveness remain a continuous flow.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean nothing happened; forgiveness means you’re able to move beyond what happened. When the offense is no longer holding you back, you can live free from the bondage of the infraction.

Let’s start small. Maybe a cashier was rude to you or someone cut you off on the interstate. Take a deep breath in and practice letting one small offense go as you breathe out. As you create a habit of regular forgiveness, work your way into the tougher areas you’ve deemed “unforgivable.”