Comfort Zone: Stretching Beyond Your LimitsSýnishorn

“Would I like you?” is the final question I ask every job candidate. That question generates a deeper level of conversation. 

What about me? If I’m asking this question of others, I’d better be able to answer it for myself. Am I likable? Do I have a high likability factor? What would others say about me? 

It matters. My likability factor influences the temperature of my relationships at home, at work, with friends, and with anyone I meet.

Let me be clear. I’m not talking about doing whatever it takes for people to like you in order to boost your self-esteem. I’m talking about expanding your sphere of influence. Your likability improves the way you relate to others.

I know that at the core, we all have a desire to be liked. I’ve discovered that many people think they’re more likable than others consider them to be. Taking a long enough pause to be on the other side of ourselves can be revealing and motivating.

What about Jesus? People were drawn to him. They followed him around. He was intriguing. He was likable.

Tim Sanders, former Yahoo! executive, writes, “When I say someone is likable, all I mean is they have this consistency in their ability to produce positive experiences for other people, emotionally.”

Here are nine simple ways to become more likable:
1. Smile. You often get a smile when you give a smile.
2. Be friendly. Be open and interested in others.
3. Pay attention to your resting face. Watch what your face says.
4. Be real. Align your words and your actions.
5. Be conversationally generous. Listen more and talk less.
6. Connect with others. Ask about their passions.
7. Show empathy. Walk in another person’s shoes.
8. Maximize humor. Laugh at yourself.
9. Love more. Find tangible ways to show you care.

Want to make friends? Explore your likability factor. If I care about what the Bible teaches and the way Jesus lived, I must prioritize boosting my likability. When this happens, people are drawn to you, which will result in better friendships and more opportunities to share the story of how Jesus changed your life. If people like you, there is a greater chance they will like him.

Jason Young
Guest Services Director