Raising Your Grandchildren Sýnishorn

 An Often-Misunderstood Word

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. John 15:12

When Tom and Dawn took custody of their two grandchildren, they didn’t do it because they were eager to foster parent or adopt another child in their home. They did it for one reason: compelling love. That sounds nice, but what does it mean?

We all know that love is often misused and misunderstood. Depending upon whom you talk to, you will find numerous definitions and descriptions of love, most of which have little to do with real love. Since God is love, perhaps we ought to find out what He says it means.

Jesus talked about it a lot while He lived on the earth. He also modeled it. In fact, immediately prior to His crucifixion, He stood before Pilate who was asking about Jesus’ kingship. Here’s what Jesus told Pilate: “In fact, for this reason I was born, and for this I came into the world, to testify to the truth” (John 18:37). What truth? The truth He had just talked to His disciples about—who the Father is and what love really looks like. That’s why He told His disciples to love each other as He had loved them, because His love was the real thing.

So, what does God’s definition of love look like? Jesus described it when He said, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). Grandparents like you and Tom and Dawn, who have taken on the role of parenting their grandchild(ren), exhibit it when you chose to do the right thing at a great cost to yourself. You sacrificed much because your desire is for their best. You put your interests, your comforts, even your future aside for the well-being of these children. You are living examples of a lay-down-your-life kind of love on behalf of those grandchildren. But it doesn’t end there, does it? 

Your love is not limited to your grandchildren. It must also extend to that wayward adult child whose messes and bad choices are the reason your grandchildren are with you and continue to infect your relationship. Or what about those other family members who do not support your decision to take your grandchildren, or “friends” and church people who criticize and judge your decision? Do you love them the same way?

That’s when it gets hard, doesn’t it? Yet, that is where the rubber hits the road for this often-misunderstood word called love. After all, loving our neighbor as ourselves is not limited to those who are easiest to love. It’s the kind of love Christ extends to us.

Prayer: Lord, help me to not limit my love to only those who are easy to love, but to also love those who are hard to love.