Half the Battle Sýnishorn

Day 3—Dealing with Your Pain

We all have hurts. Some are small wounds of rejection that happen on a daily basis; others are cataclysmic events that shape us in ways we haven’t even realized. Many times, we’ve carried our pain so long that we’ve forgotten it is even there.

The first step to healing is acknowledging your pain. Be brutally honest with yourself. Who or what has hurt you? It doesn’t matter if the situation was small or huge—a piece of it remains in you. Take your pain out of your subconscious and bring it into the light. 

Next, decide what you are going to do with your pain. One option is to hide it away. It feels too heavy and difficult to deal with, so you bury it in a dark corner of your heart and keep it hidden. The problem with this method is that pain doesn’t decrease in darkness. Instead, it becomes bigger and bigger until it begins to impact your thought life, your relationships, and your habits.

A second option is to pass the pain off to those around you. It’s your friend’s fault that you’re an addict, and it’s your family’s fault that you lose your temper. However, this strategy still doesn’t lessen the pain. Think of someone who has the flu. Spreading it to someone else doesn’t lessen the effects of the virus on the original sick person. They are still sick, and now so is the newly infected person. The same is true for trying to pass off your pain. You still carry it with you, and now so do the people you love.

There is a third option—carrying your pain along. You tell yourself, “This is my problem. I will just carry it and handle it myself.” That may work for a while, but then you will start to feel the weight of the pain. You can try repositioning it (telling yourself you just need a little more money, a little more attention, etc.), but the pain will eventually wear you down because it’s just too heavy. 

If hiding, passing, and carrying your pain aren’t healthy options, what can you do? You can lay it at the feet of Jesus. In Matthew 11:28, He says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Jesus can take the broken pieces of your life and build something beautiful for His glory and for your good. You can trust Him with your pain.

What pain do you need to acknowledge and bring to Jesus?