Calming AngerSýnishorn

Develop a Plan

Before we bought our home we hired an inspector who gave us a full report of potential issues with the house. Based on his consultation, we knew what we needed to watch for. Like that inspector, anger can be a great personal consultant. It can show you the threats to your security, connection, and control that tend to create problems for you. 

When you know those root causes, you can develop a plan for how to prepare and stay calm when you get into situations that could potentially trigger your anger.  

If I know I’m going to hit heavy traffic (and my wife won’t be in the car wanting quality time together), I have an audiobook cued up.

When I’m going to the doctor, I clear my entire schedule for the day and that evening. (Not really, but sometimes it feels like I should!)  

If I know I’m going to miss a meal, I bring a snack so I don’t get “hangry.”  

When I know I’m going to talk to certain people (or see their posts on social media), I prepare myself for what they might say that could make me mad.  

I prepare things the night before to lessen the craziness of trying to get the family out the door in the morning.  

When I’ve been paying attention to my anger and know what situations in the past got me angry, I’m much less prone to getting irritated. You’ll need to do the same.  

King Solomon said, “The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and pay the penalty.” (Proverbs 22:3, NIV). You can avoid d-anger, when you have a game plan prepared beforehand. Prepare a game plan for how to remain patient in those situations that consistently lead to anger. 

Take some time today to think back on what has irritated you recently or made you angry. What could you do to prepare yourself so, next time you're in a similar situation, you’ll be able to keep yourself calm. It may be as simple as giving yourself a mental pep-talk. Do whatever it takes to plan, in advance, how you are going to cut anger off at the pass. You can do this!