Obedience Over Hustle: Surrendering the Striving Heart Sýnishorn

Jealousy and the Fear of Missing Out

“What am I missing out on?” is a question we are familiar with. The very first time this thought was introduced was in the Garden of Eden. 

The cunning whisper of a fallen angel, the one who speaks nothing but lies,  proposed that God was somehow holding out on us. Satan’s devious lips promised Eve that there was something better waiting on the other side of the fruit; that what God had given her wasn’t the best; that she was missing out and that what she wanted, was her right to attain at any cost necessary.

The bite of the forbidden fruit was the first act of disobedience in the history of man. It was also the first act based on FOMO (fear of missing out). Throughout scripture, individuals have believed the lie that God doesn’t want them to have success, or that they have to “do” something to hurry His promise. And today, things are no different.

Many of us struggle to be happy when friends succeed because we are afraid that God has forgotten us. We believe that our time has passed, that His favor has run out, or that we are too little, too late. This fear is a result of a belief that God doesn’t have enough to go around.

Throughout scripture, there are countless promises of God’s goodness, faithfulness, and generosity. His kindness, favor, and blessings are beyond measure, yet still, we give in to our fears and insecurities. We forget all that He’s done, and instead believe that we have the right to achieve all that we want, to “be all that we can be.” We fail to see that God’s measure of success is different, as is His timing, and the way in which it is attained. If only we could set our gaze on what is before us, rather than on what’s happening around us in the lives of others.

In John chapter 21, Jesus was having an intimate conversation with Peter, yet Peter’s preoccupation was not with his future, but John’s! “Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, ‘Lord, who is going to betray you?’) When Peter saw [John], he asked, ‘Lord, what about him?’” (John 21: 20-21 NIV).

Peter had a severe case of FOMO. He completely missed just how incredible this moment was. Not only had Jesus pulled Peter away from the rest of the disciples for a private conversation, but He had covered Peter’s past failure with grace and mercy. Jesus decided to reinstate Peter (despite his recent denial) as one of the key leaders of His ministry and movement. He was setting Peter up to be one of the great fathers of the early church! This tender moment was one that other men dreamed of, yet Peter was concerned only with what Jesus was going to say to John. Because of his FOMO, he didn’t recognize what Jesus was saying and offering him. And I wonder. . .how many moments do we miss for the same reason?

Have you wondered, like Eve, if God was holding out on you, instead of trusting what He’s said or given you? Have you pointed to someone else, like Peter did—demanding that God give you the same assignment— instead of resting in what He’s asked you to do?

Is the fear of missing out (FOMO) driving your decisions?

Are you listening to the lies telling you that what you have right now isn’t enough, that you deserve more, that God messed up somehow?