Mother's Day: 5 Day Bible Plan Sýnishorn

God’s vision for family

If you’re struggling to feel like you are part of your church family on Mothering Sunday, or any other day of the week, then you’re not alone. The church rightly describes itself as a family, but sadly so often the childless can feel on the outside of what, in reality, can often feel like a collection of nuclear families rather than one big family. I don’t believe the church intentionally seeks to isolate those whose lives don’t represent the majority, but redefining family doesn’t just happen naturally; it’s costly, and requires every one of us to re-evaluate the priorities we place on our relationships.

Jesus’ teachings about family vary a lot; in one moment He’s telling us to honour our mother and father and the next He tells us to hate them. His message appears to be both family friendly and anti-family at the same time, and it can be hard to work out what to do with this. The groups we’re a part of, especially our families, all contribute to our identity, but Jesus is calling us to leave those groups behind, to let go of how we used to identify ourselves and embrace a new group, a new family and a new identity. Mark 1:14-20 shows James and John leaving their father behind to follow Jesus, which would have been viewed as a radical change of allegiance, leaving their father and the family business behind. Jesus isn’t just calling us to follow Him as individuals, but to join His alternative family.

Somewhere along the way this radical change of loyalty from earthly families to the family of God got watered down and now, as Christians in the West, we often set our priorities like this:

1.  God

2.  Family

3.  Church

4.  Others

We’ve somehow separated out our loyalty to God and our loyalty to the church family. We’re more focused on experiencing God at a personal level, and church often becomes that place you go to when you’re not busy. But Jesus’ call to follow Him was inseparable from His call to become part of His alternative family. When you look at the early church in Acts 4, you can see how their loyalty to God and fellow believers was not separated; for them, their priorities looked something like this:

1.  God’s Family

2.  My Family

3.  Others

In God’s kingdom, family is more than a husband, a wife and a child. In God’s kingdom, family encompasses everyone who follows Jesus – that’s a really big family! Church shouldn’t be a place of pain for you, and I’m so sorry if that’s been your experience; it’s not fair, and the church was never meant to be a place that reminded you of what you didn’t have. It was meant to be your new home. Regardless of your experience of church, my prayer is that the knowledge that Jesus has invited you to be part of His alternative family brings you comfort and healing. Your new identity in Jesus’ family declares your childlessness cannot define your identity, your value or your contribution to the church or the world. You belong in His family. You belong to the King.

How do you feel about your church family at the moment?

If there is bitterness, anger or pain towards your church family, then take this to God, ask for His healing and for Him to redeem this pain.

What can you do to help represent Jesus’ definition of family better?

When the church was a family, it was on fire. Spend some time praying for the church to become a better reflection of Jesus’ definition of family.