Mastering Our Emotions: Biblical Principles for Emotional HealthSample

The Purpose of Emotions: Guilt and Shame

Guilt and shame are emotional responses to falling short of a personally significant standard. Guilt often results from falling short of moral or societal standards in our behavior. For example, if you promised a loved one that you would visit them in the hospital when they became ill but failed to do so, guilt would prompt you to apologize and make it up to the person upon discharge.

Shame occurs when we fail to meet a personal standard and feel “less than others” as a result. Shame usually reflects a deeper, negative perception of ourselves in relation to others. For example, if I broke a team rule and it resulted in my entire team getting in trouble, shame could be the emotional response. Like sadness, shame prompts us to withdraw from others to process what occurred and make amends. It is important to note that both guilt and shame serve a God-given purpose. When responded to correctly, guilt and shame can help us improve our relationships and work harder in areas of our lives.

However, chronic guilt and shame, which often have multiple causes, can have devastating consequences. Spiritually, we must be careful with the emotions of guilt and shame. Chronic guilt can be similar to condemnation, which Romans 8:1 speaks against for the believer. Being “contrite” (i.e., convicted by the Holy Spirit), on the other hand, would be the godly/adaptive response to an emotion such as guilt.

• Spend a few moments recalling a time when you felt guilt. Did the emotion move you toward any kind of action? Hiding? Fixing? Confession?
• Which life experiences have informed how you view guilt and shame? In what ways?
• How do you hold God's deep and unconditional love for you along with God-given purposes of guilt and shame?