Living in Increase (Part 11) - Increase in JoySample

Forgiveness in Tragedy

On October 2, 2006, twenty-year-old Matt Swatzell headed home after a long day as a firefighter. His exhaustion overcame him, and he began nodding off while driving. He crossed the center line and crashed into an oncoming car. He was abruptly awakened by a horrendous noise of bending metal and breaking glass as his car collided with June Fitzgerald’s car. June and her unborn child did not survive the accident. Her 19-month-old daughter was injured but lived.

June’s husband, Erik, suddenly found himself as a widower with a young daughter whom he would now have to raise alone. The love of his life and best friend was gone. Erik was a pastor. He recalled a message he had once heard from one of his peers. In moments of tragedy or even hurt, there are opportunities to demonstrate grace or exact vengeance. Erik understood that he had a choice while staring into the face of tragedy. He chose forgiveness and grace. He did not pursue the maximum penalties against Matt. The judge ordered Matt to pay a fine and do community service.

On the second anniversary of June’s death, these men met for the first time. Erik approached Matt’s truck outside of a grocery store. Matt wept as Erik told him that he forgave him. They spent the next few hours talking. Since then, their friendship has grown stronger. Although Matt was relieved to be forgiven by Erik, he still struggled to forgive himself. Through Erik’s mentorship and counsel, Matt had renewed hope.

No one would blame Erik for being angry and seeking justice as defined by human institutions. Some may even be critical of him for not seeking harsher penalties. But the choice that Erik made allowed him to avoid bitterness. It allowed him to heal. It allowed him to model what real love and grace look like to his young daughter. It allowed him to see the beauty and joy in an unlikely friendship.

Julie Austin

Action Step: Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you toward choosing forgiveness.