Trusting God's Plan When You Don't See Him: Lessons From the Book of EstherSample

Yesterday, we left the scene with Vashti refusing to entertain the king and his nobles, which caused a huge problem in the King’s court. Xerxes is furious, and it seems he can’t control his wife. This is a bad look for the king. Remember, he just held a week-long party to impress all the nobles of Susa. So if you’re Xerxes, who ya gonna call? He summoned his lawyers and advisors, who“knew the times” and the laws of Persia. Notice the people he does not call are the Persian priests or religious leaders. No godly counsel here for Xerxes.

Can you relate to this situation? You have a problem that’s happened today. What’s your first reaction? Is it to call a friend? Your spouse? A parent? A coworker? Who do you talk to? Is talking to God about your problem your first go-to or your last ditch effort? Be honest! I know a lot of times, I forget to go to God first and just try to handle things in my own expertise. Then, when things escalate, or I feel more anxious, I finally remember to seek God’s counsel on the issue. It’s shocking to think of the peace I often forfeit just because I ask the wrong people for advice instead of going to God first. I’m just sayin’!

So all the advisors come in and tell Xerxes if he doesn’t do something, then, “This very day the Persian and Median women of the nobility who have heard about the queen’s conduct will respond to all the king’s nobles in the same way. There will be no end of disrespect and discord.” (Esther 2:18) Let’s be real, these guys were worried about their own wives, so they advised the king to issue a decree banishing Vashti and giving her position to“someone else who is better than her.” This is important because they actually wrote this into law, and as we’ll see later in the story, when something is written into law, it can’t be repealed.

I love that the guys writing this law think that it will make for a better home environment.“Then when the king’s edict is proclaimed throughout all his vast realm, all the women will respect their husbands, from the least to the greatest.” (v. 20) Ok, I’m no counselor or love guru, but making a law is not the way to earn respect. In fact, there’s a great passage in Ephesians 5:21-33 about husbands and wives that speaks to this concept.

“However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband” (Ephesians 5:33). In this passage, we see a wonderful cycle of love and respect. For the most part, women were created to want to be loved, and men were created to want to be respected. If a guy wants respect, then the best way for him to earn it is to show his wife love. In return, she’ll respect him because she feels his love for her. We could go on for days just on this topic alone, but demanding respect is not the way to get it.

As you saw, Vashti is out as queen, making room for someone new in the palace. If you haven’t checked it out, listen to our “A Little Extra” clip at the top of this page. I can promise you we’re having some great discussions about this passage that you won’t want to miss.

Questions:

1. How do you handle a problem when it comes your way, and who is your go to for counsel?

2. Do you choose to go to God first for your problems? What benefit is that to you?

3. What do you think about the reciprocity of love and respect? Is there truth to that in your relationships?