Offense is the Root of Bitterness.

Life is hard, no doubt about it. The wounds left by life’s treacherous journey can be deep. If you’ve journeyed through years of parenting alone, it’s likely you’ve faced many battles. And frankly, some can seem quite unfair. Most of us have faced more battles than we know what to do with as we swing against rejection, loneliness, financial ruin, abuse, loss, and pain. Parenting challenges and family wounds can leave us limping. Repeated broken hearts leave us mutilated, emaciated, and weak.

The wounds left by those battles can sometimes leave us angry. Why us? Why another battle? Why have we had to suffer so much? If we’re not careful, anger births offense. And if left unattended, an offense can develop a full-fledged tree of bitterness. Living bitter is exhausting. I’ve been there – mad at the world, demanding too much from others, looking for war at every turn, ready to explode within moments. But this is not God’s intention for our lives. There’s no qualify of life when bitterness runs rampant. There’s no joy. No freedom.

Here are a few tips for finding freedom from bitterness and offense:

1. Recognize the plan of the enemy. He comes to cause division. He comes to steal your joy, kill your hope, and destroy a good quality of life. He comes to wreak havoc in every area of your life. It is His plan for your heart to be easily wounded, such that you need to lash out at others. It’s his plan for you to harbor unforgiveness that grows into a bitter root. Know who you war against and develop strategies that are effective. (Check out tomorrow’s devotional!)
2. Evaluate the root. Hurt births offense. What’s going on beneath the surface? Are you hurting from an old wound? Has the death of a loved one lingered and caused you to lash out at others in pain? Did the divorce or lost relationship cause you to lose joy and become bitter? Did you take the time to heal, or are you bleeding all over others? Are you personally irritated with an individual, harboring resentment such that everything they do becomes more of an irritant? Ask the Lord to show you the root of the thing. We must pull bitterness out at the root. Cutting it off at the surface leaves room for re-growth.
3. Assess the truth. Often offense comes from misunderstandings or a lack of communication. Take the time to assess the truth about the situation. Don’t assume that they meant to hurt you or the situation is worse than it is. Sometimes, the email really wasn’t meant to hurt you, and the words weren’t meant to cut you. Sometimes, even when it was meant to hurt you, it’s because the other party is also functioning from unhealed wounds! Let’s issue grace to one another instead of assumptions as we evaluate the intentions behind words and actions.
4. Forgive easily. Forgive when it isn’t deserved. Forgive when they don’t ask for it. Forgive often and easily. A root of offense has no time to grow or form or wreak havoc in our lives when we are quick to forgive. Now, this is not a small feat, no doubt! But the easier we move through forgiveness, the easier offense is to battle. Be reminded of all you’ve been forgiven of.

Mommas, unforgiveness, and the offense will undoubtedly lead to the bondage of bitterness. Do not allow bitterness to grow root. Do you find yourself angry when you wake up? Do you find yourself meditating on the offense, the pain? Do you replay the disappointment of the past? Do you stalk your offenders on social media?

The freedom of forgiveness lends way to a spacious life of new opportunities that the Lord has for you in the next season. He wants to teach you about the forgiveness you received as His son hung on a cross for you. He wants to show you an unfailing love that flows so plentiful that bitterness has no room to flourish. He wants to teach you peace that makes no sense. But it can only be experienced as you lay down the bondage of bitterness.

Points to Ponder:

• Who in your life are you harboring unforgiveness and offense against? How is this affecting your spiritual walk?