Speak Life: Choose Your Words Carefully by Treal RavenelSample

You Are The Creator Of Your Own Happiness!

We are living in unprecedented times and it is hard to tell someone do not worry in a worrisome world but instead, choose happiness. We are all creators of our own happiness. There is no one person who is responsible for bringing happiness into your life. Too often, we leave that responsibility up to others and find out soon enough that they are either unwilling or unable to meet that need. This is true for couples as well. I have spoken to countless couples who felt that it was their spouse’s responsibility to make them happy. While your spouse should contribute to your internal happiness, you are the sole proprietor of your level of happy. 

When individuals place that responsibility on their spouse, it puts pressure on the other person to perform. They find themselves doing things outside of their comfort zone and element just to make their spouse happy. This can also make your spouse feel that marriage is more of a chore than it is a ministry or blessing from God. I have heard some Christians say that God does not want us to be happy, but I respectfully disagree with that. I understand that as Christians, we have the joy of the Lord living within us. I wholeheartedly believe that God cares about our happiness. Our means to an end as a believer is not happiness, however, all the promises in God’s word will indeed create a level of happiness in our lives. God has given us free reign to pursue happiness as we pursue Him. He has given us all things that pertain unto life and godliness. That means that he has given us things for our natural and spiritual well-being. Would you not agree that happiness is a part of our natural well-being? 

Simply getting married will not make you happy. Both you and your spouse must be intentional about your own happiness. What you possess inwardly will transcend outwardly into your marriage. If you are generally a happy person, that is a great a quality to share with your spouse by how you show up daily. In seeking happiness, enjoy life together but remember God while doing so. Keep God’s purpose at the forefront of your minds and hearts and be careful not to place false or unrealistic expectations on your spouse to meet a need that only you and God can meet. “The way to be truly happy is to be truly human, and the way to be truly human is to be truly godly” J.I. Packer

Reflection: What are some things that are within your power to do immediately or soon implement, to live out your own happiness and responsibly share that with your spouse?

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