How to Live as a Victor, Not a Victim!Sample

The First Six Signs of a Victim Mentality

Sign #1: You Feel Powerless

You may have a victim mentality if you feel powerless to fix the problems in your life or even cope with them. Remember, the crippled man felt powerless to get into the water first. The truth is you are not powerless. The Spirit that raised Christ from the dead dwells in you (Rom. 8:11). That truth makes you powerful!

Sign #2: You Inflate Injustice & Ignore God

You may have a victim mentality if you magnify injustice and exalt the enemy’s power over God’s power. In other words, you concentrate on what the devil has done to the point that you’re magnifying the destructive work of Satan instead of magnifying the restorative work of the Savior.

Psalm 34:3–5 tells us plainly, “Oh, magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt His name together. I sought the Lord, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.” Magnify means “to increase in significance” or “to enlarge in fact or in appearance.” When we magnify the devil’s facts over God’s truth, we live as victims. When we magnify the Lord, we live as victors.

Sign #3: You are Consumed by Paranoia

You may have a victim mentality if you think people are out to get you and even wonder sometimes if God is on your side. This may ultimately manifest as paranoia. We think of Romans 8:31, “If God is for me, who can be against me?” Sometimes we just don’t understand why God would let the injustice happen.

I can imagine how Joshua felt after the massive slaughter against Ai. In Joshua 1:5, God told him clearly, “No man will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, I will be with you. I will not abandon you. I will not leave you” (MEV). But then Israel was defeated at Ai and Joshua wasted no time accusing God: “O Lord God, why did You bring this people across the Jordan to give us into the hands of the Amorites to destroy us?” (Josh. 7:7, MEV).

I understand why Joshua was confused. God said He would help him, and suddenly he lost a major battle. Did God lie? No, the enemy attacked. There was an open door, but Joshua didn’t discern it. Achan had taken spoils from the last war, which God prohibited. Joshua didn’t know it until the Lord exposed it. Thankfully, Joshua quickly shook off the victim mindset and rallied to win the next battle. So can you.

Sign #4: You Reject Godly Counsel

You may have a victim mentality if you get easily offended when someone tries to help you see your life from God’s perspective, or you reject godly counsel because you feel like no one understands your plight. You may justify your victim mentality with words like the bitter man I met at the gas station offered: “But you don’t understand…” There is no justification for victimhood. For freedom’s sake, Christ died to set you free (Gal. 5:1).

Sign #5: You Refuse to Take Responsibility

You may have a victim mentality if you refuse to take any responsibility for your position in life. You don’t consider that you may be responding through the wrong lens to the circumstances in which you find yourself. You blame the devil, other people, and even God but don’t look at how you contributed to your woes by disobeying God, failing to acknowledge Him in a big decision, or otherwise missing His warnings or instructions.

Remember this, life is not fair, but God is just.

Sign #6: You Plan a Pity Party

You may have a victim mentality if you get upset when people don’t give you the sympathy you think you deserve. When they don’t RSVP to your pity party, you feel rejected. The only ones who join in your pity party are other miserable people who want to take turns complaining about their lives.