You Are Not Behind: How to Start Building a Life You Love TodaySample

Day 5: Be Careful How You Cope

We, at times, all have an ache in us for more—a discontentment with life not turning out the way we thought it would. When we have moments, days, or even years of waiting for it to be “our turn,” that discontentment can wear on us.

In the middle of waiting, we can start to believe we are the only ones who feel this way. When that happens, we usually try to take control of our circumstances—sometimes not in a good way. When people get stuck feeling behind, they try to cope. Coping mechanisms can help us get through challenging emotions and circumstances. Still, they can easily go too far when they become the source of our satisfaction and escape from reality or the only way we can function.

Another problem with coping mechanisms is that they rarely fix what’s going on beneath the surface. If we don’t address what we are trying to avoid, we will never experience the abundance God has in store. He is the coping mechanism we need to pursue. John 15:4 says, “Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.”

We all have ways we overcompensate for feeling behind. Some coping mechanisms may include:

• Collecting experiences (especially ones that look really good on social media)
• Overindulging and spending more money than you have on clothes, food, and trips
• Jam-packing your daily schedule because you’re afraid of what might happen when you get still and quiet
• Avoiding your own feelings by staying busy and over-committing to activities
• Choosing to separate yourself from certain people or situations that might remind you you’re not where you want to be

What are you running so hard after? What new circumstance do you believe will change everything? Reaching your milestone probably won’t feel as good as you thought it would.

I think there’s an invitation here we are ignoring: to find purpose in the process instead of rushing to get to the other side.

Because can I tell you a secret? Your life has more to offer you than you give it credit for. God is in the middle of working on something really important IN you and FOR you. So let’s not run ahead without finding out what’s right here. You are not behind. Amen?