Practicing Secrecy in an Age of InfluenceSample

Approval: An Addict’s Guide to Freedom

Previously, we considered one reason why we are often willing to exchange an eternal reward from God in Heaven for a momentary reward from others here on earth: our craving for instant gratification.

Today, we will look closer at a second reason: approval addiction.

Over the years, John Ortberg has written extensively on the topic of approval addiction—a disease that, whether we realize it or not, we all suffer from on some level. In his now classic book, The Life You Have Always Wanted, Ortberg writes, "Vast amounts of human behavior, though painstakingly disguised, are simply attempts at showing off. We want to impress other people without letting on that we're trying to impress them. Approval addiction is a full-blown disease of which showing off may be just one minor symptom. Approval addiction involves not just trying to attract attention for what we do well, but also avoiding saying what we truly think if we believe speaking up could draw disapproval."

In the Gospel of John, we see one of the most heartbreaking examples of approval addiction. John 12:42-43 says, "Nevertheless many, even of the authorities, believed in him. But because of the Pharisees, they did not confess it, for fear that they would be put out of the synagogue; for they loved human glory more than the glory that comes from God."

So what caused these would-be followers of Jesus to miss out on His invitation? One word: Fear.

#1: Fear of rejection. "Many, even of the authorities," believed Jesus' words, but sadly, they allowed the fear of being rejected by the Pharisees to keep them from confessing with their mouths that He was Lord.

#2: Fear of being misunderstood. Sadly, they missed out on "the glory that comes from God" because they could not make the leap from belief to confession. They failed to say what needed to be said when it needed to be said.

#3: Fear of losing their earthly position. When push came to shove, and Jesus' invitation required these "authorities" to stand up and testify that He was the Messiah; they couldn't do it. Why? Because they were unwilling to exchange their earthly status and the synagogue life that came with it for Jesus' offer of eternal life.

Things are not that much different today. These same three fears can keep you and me trapped in our own web of approval addiction. Friend, it does not have to be this way. The practice of secrecy is Jesus' gift to all who struggle with approval addiction. So what is the Father's reward for us if we lean into practicing secrecy? Freedom. We can finally be free from the swirling anxiety and constant worry about what others think about us that drives so many of our daily decisions.