The Path to Freedom: 5 Steps to Porn-Free LivingSample

Step 4: Discover True Accountability

People today are more isolated than ever. With smart devices, remote work and access to goods and services online, you could go days, weeks, or months without leaving your house. But we weren’t meant to be solitary creatures. When God created Adam, He said it wasn’t good for him to be alone, so He created Eve. Life isn’t mean to be lived alone, and a struggle like the struggle against porn isn’t meant to be fought alone.

The first three steps to porn-free living invited us into a process of behavior change that can truly set us in a new direction. But if this is all we do, long-term freedom is unlikely. We will need support on this journey, and that support can only happen when someone knows what we really struggle with and what our plans are to change. This is the value of accountability. It invites another person into our life who can help us see and overcome our blind spots. A good accountability partner will likely be someone you already know and trust. This could be a friend, a pastor, or a mentor who knows some of the truth of your story and struggle.

Consider these action steps to help you take a step toward accountability:

1) Identify someone in your life who would make a good accountability partner, and then to reach out to them and ask them to meet up soon to talk.

2) Make a plan for a consistent day and time of the week to connect with your accountability partner.

3) Add accountability software to all of your devices and then invite your accountability partner to be on these plans.

As an additional step, consider incorporating the Commitment to Change tool to your regular accountability conversations. It can be easy for accountability to relapse into “performance-based” accountability, where someone only asks, “Did you relapse this week?” This minimizes the whole recovery process down to pass or fail. This question might be part of the process, but it isn’t the whole process. Try using these questions for a more holistic approach to recovery:

· What area do I need to change or what challenge am I facing this week?

· What will it cost me if I don’t change?

· What will it cost me if I do change? What fear will I have to face?

· What is my specific (measurable) plan regarding this commitment to change?

· What are the details of my accountability this week—what questions can my accountability partner ask me?

Thought of the Day: God has given me the gifts of community and accountability to help me on this journey of recovery. Today, I will reach out to a friend, pastor