Wonderfully ComplexSample

THE ROOT CAUSE OF COMPLEX EMOTIONS

Complex emotions are best understood when we understand how they are triggered by our three most crucial needs. Complex emotion is the exposed fruit of unmet needs. Every human has three crucial needs, regardless of race, religion, age, culture, or gender. Three crucial needs impact and influence every choice I make on this earth.

• The need to love and know we are loved.
• The need for purpose and meaning.
• The need for self-worth and experiencing our value.

Every drive we have, and choice we make is underpinned by these three needs, originating in the heart of God.

Our need for love is rooted in the fact that we were made in the image of God. 1 John 4:8 tells us that God is love, which is the image in which we were made, hence our need to give and receive love.

Our need for purpose began in the heart of God, who designed us with intentionality and planning. Genesis started with God placing mankind in the garden to tend to and work it. Hence, our need to discover and live out of purpose.

Lastly, our need for self-worth is rooted in the relational aspect of God. He knew it was not good to be alone because, as humans, we experience our value in the context of relationships with God and each other.

Complex emotions are often triggered when the goal of obtaining these crucial needs is either blocked, uncertain, or unreachable. When we seek to meet these needs in creation instead of the Creator, complex emotions are triggered because creation fails to sustain or meet the need fully like only God can. Creation is like the deserts of life; they are quick fixes, but only when the Creator meets our needs do we have long-lasting sustenance.

Creation was not meant to provide us with our source of meaning; only God can. We are meant to enjoy creation but do not find our identity in it.

The next three sessions will be dedicated to unpacking the three core complex emotions of anger, anxiety, and guilt before we land on how to better manage triggered complex emotions.

Before we end today’s reflection, I want to draw your attention to Genesis 2:25, as it intentionally declares that even though Adam and Eve were vulnerable in their nakedness, there was no complex emotion before the fall. They were both naked and felt NO SHAME. This is hugely significant in understanding the root solution to complex emotions. We will lean into this at the end of this reading plan.

REFLECTIVE QUESTIONS:

• Out of the three crucial needs shared, which one have you struggled with most?

Love, Purpose, or Value

• What has been your greatest hurt in life, and is there a link between that experience and your crucial need?

PRAY

Lord, thank You that You created my needs and You created me with the ability to feel even the most complex of emotions. I pray you will be a safe space for me to process what I feel and that I can bring all my cares to you.