Three Habits of a Peacemaker From Archbishop Justin WelbySample

Be Curious

The first of the three habits of peacemaking that we will explore is: be curious.

I wonder what comes to mind when you think of curiosity. It doesn’t always sound like a habit we want to cultivate. Some people think that it sounds intrusive or gossipy.

But in the life of Jesus we see a curiosity which is just the opposite. In the account of his encounter with a Samaritan woman (John 4: 1-30), Jesus engages her in conversation and opens up space for her to tell her story. In another story recounted in Luke’s gospel (Luke 24:13-25), Jesus appears to two disheartened disciples after the resurrection. Despite knowing all things as only God can, Jesus’ first action is to ask a question: "What are you discussing together as you walk along?"

In the face of difference or conflict, our immediate instinct can be to shut down or disengage. In these stories, Jesus shows another way. His posture of curiosity bridges a divide and creates space for honest conversation. Taking the time to pause and wonder can stop us reacting destructively and enable us instead to engage creatively.

Where gossip and nosiness are self-focused, the peacemaking habit of being curious is about opening ourselves to others. It’s about listening to others' stories and seeing how the world looks through their eyes. Instead of making assumptions, we approach others with a sense of wonder.

We read in Genesis 1: 26-27 that every person is made in the image of God. When we are curious about another person and seek to understand their story, we affirm their God-given value. We also cultivate humility because we recognize that we don’t have all the answers and that our own perception is limited. We need God and one another.

Questions to pray about and reflect on:

• Who are the people I know so well that I have stopped being curious about?
• How could I seek to better understand opinions or reactions that I don't initially understand?