Embracing the Gift of Sex in Marriage: Looking Through a Biblical Lens Part 1Sample

Today’s verse is not about controlling each other’s bodies. It is not about one being able to do whatever they want to the other. It is not to be used to shame, coerce, or manipulate our spouse into having sex. Paul is simply stressing the importance of sex in marriage and that God’s design is that once married, sex is confined to the marriage relationship. It instructs a couple to be sensitive to and responsive to each other’s sexual needs. It is to be done in love and in consideration of each other with a mindset of “giving,” rather than taking.

In most couples, the husband is physically stronger than his wife. In sex, the wife is very vulnerable. For her to freely give herself to her husband both physically and emotionally, she must feel safe and secure. She needs to know that he will be gentle with her, listen to her, and never use his strength to overpower her. That allows her to engage in sex with her husband fully and completely.

I believe this verse stresses these two things. Sex is designed for marriage and both the husband and the wife have a responsibility in fulfilling that design. It is not I control you and you control me; rather it is a mutual exchange of authority. My body is here for you and your body for me. We freely give ourselves to each other. In doing so, we are not only growing together in our sexual relationship but we are also building a wall of protection from temptation, from the outside world and its crazy definitions of sex.

When we get past the idea of controlling one another in sex, we get this beautiful picture of a husband and a wife fully giving themselves to the other.

Today’s Challenge:

If there is anything in your sex life that works against safety and security, it is time to identify it and to begin addressing it. Have that conversation today, and take whatever next steps are necessary to eliminate that from your marriage.