Exploring Forgiveness Through FilmSample

Love Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry...

“Love means never having to say you’re sorry” is a line from the movie “Love Story,” and it is probably one of the most quoted movie lines in history (#13 on the AFI top 100 list). The story revolves around two college students - Oliver, the heir to a family fortune who meets Jenny, a baker’s daughter. They fall in love and get married despite parental disapproval. It’s a beautiful story and a monumental tear-jerker. However, that infamous line has got to be the worst advice ever when it comes to relational health. In order to maintain a healthy relationship, knowing when and how to apologize is crucial.

Let’s face it, every one of us has had an experience where we said or did something in the heat of the moment that hurt someone. And the impact of the wound created, if left unresolved, can ruin the relationship with that family member, friend, neighbor, or co-worker. Most likely, the wounded person is not going to be quoting “Love Story” to you because all they know is that you hurt them. If you truly value the relationship, love actually means having to say, “I’m sorry.”

The Apostle Paul shares in Romans 12:18 - “Do all that you can to live at peace with everyone.” “Doing all that you can” may mean making a sincere and heartfelt apology to someone you wounded. Admitting being wrong is never easy, but mending a relationship is more important than personal discomfort. Start by talking to God. Tell him what was said or done and take responsibility for the part you played in the situation. Be open to seeing it from the other person’s perspective. Next, consider some ways you might be able to make things right. Then go to that individual and make a genuine and sincere apology. Be careful not to say “I’m sorry, but…” or “I’m sorry that…” statements. Those are ways to excuse or justify your wrong actions. Just say, “I’m sorry. I was wrong. Please forgive me.”

The apology may or may not be accepted. If it is rejected, it just means the wounded person may not be ready to forgive yet. But at least you took the first step in trying to make things right, following Paul’s advice to “do all you can to live at peace with everyone.”

Is there a relationship in your life that could be repaired by offering a sincere apology? Talk to God and ask him to guide you as you seek to restore the relationship.