The Hard Good: Showing Up for God to Work in You When You Want to Shut DownSample

Experiencing Peace with Life When It’s Brought Loss

My friend, Beth, has known the depth of life that has brought loss. Her toughest mission since has been one that those who face loss well understand: to make peace with a life that has gone rogue. Remaining here, when the person you love is gone. Putting one foot in front of the other. But it’s not just that. It’s continuing to go on living in a different way—a way that isn’t physical. Not becoming another casualty in the wake of an enormous loss is quite a feat. You may know this pain all too well. Sometimes other people just don’t know. They can’t. Even those who have journeyed through their own losses don’t know yours.

Loss is hard because it’s rarely on our terms. Our people matter to us. The closer the relationship, the deeper the ache when it’s lost. Part of the ache might be regret. Part of grief is often anger. But while loss makes us feel as if we’re the most unfortunate people in the world, over time, God can help us see the blessing of having gone through it. A brief gift is still a gift. 

You don’t have to agree with your loss to make peace with it. What I’m suggesting is, as part of our healing, we pray for God to change our perspective. Not only so we can simply stay alive to our life, but also so He can make much of our life. Perspective changes are not concessions. They are agreeing to possess a different outlook to help us press on while the reality of our circumstances stays the same. We can all do this, with the help of God.

Making peace when life brings loss doesn’t mean we are ever okay with it. It decides not to waste the next years trying to undo something we don’t have the power to undo. It’s choosing not to let the world steal away any more of your good life. Consider asking God to give you eyes to see something about your loss you haven’t yet been able to see. Only with His vision will we gain a different perspective, and only with Him will we possibly find anything good. As you find more of God you become stronger and more resilient. As we let Him heal our hearts, our losses can be seen as God’s greatest work in us! A work that allows us to reach out to others who are hurting.

Respond

How have you responded to loss in the past? 

How have you seen God change your perspective on your losses, and as a result changing you inside?

How does your perspective on your losses affect how God can use them to heal your heart and to help others?