Developing the Fruit of the Spirit in Your ChildSample

Kindness

By Scott Williams

John had become a bitter man. After serving an unreasonably long prison sentence for stealing, he was looking for work. But rejections based on his criminal record left him hungry, exhausted, and defeated, so he sought refuge from a faith-based shelter. The pastor there treated him with kindness. They fed him and sheltered him, but they couldn’t penetrate his hardened heart. In desperation, during the night, John stole a lot of valuables and assaulted the pastor in his escape.

When the police caught him the next day, they didn’t buy John’s lame story that the pastor had given him the valuables. John feared the worst when he faced his victim: that the truth would send him back to prison—this time for good reason.

To his shock, the pastor not only confirmed John’s story, but gave him even more valuable items and told the police to go. Now alone with John, the pastor looked him in the eye, and said, “Use what I’ve given you for good, not evil.”

You might recognize this as the plot of Les Misérables. John (Jean Valjean), was so disarmed by this act of kindness that he did change his life, and became a source of generosity and grace.

Our children tend to want to get even when wronged, but we need to show them that God isn’t that way. He doesn’t lower the boom at the first hint of wrong. He always gives us the chance to change our wrong to right.

The best way to teach kindness is by showing, just as the pastor showed John. Treat your child with kindness, like God treats you. Wrong should be addressed, but focus on what children need more than what they deserve. 

Let your children see you showing kindness to others: Prefer your spouse over yourself. Do something thoughtful for a neighbor or friend. Treat your restaurant server with respect.

When your children are unkind, they should face consequences, but ultimately, give them the opportunity to apologize and ask forgiveness from the one they’ve wronged. This is not just modeling kindness for the offender, but also to the one who’s been hurt. 

For more on kindness listen to, “Kindness Makes a Big Difference” on FamilyLifeToday.com.