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Overcoming Fear

Your story matters. But do you ever feel fear creep in when writing about your past and sharing your story?

I had someone in my Author Audience Academy group ask me this question, “Shelley, how do I ever overcome the fear of telling my story? Do you have any tips or strategies?”

To be very honest I don’t have any one specific strategy that’s the be-all-end-all to overcome fear. What I do know is that the Bible says, “Perfect love drives out fear.” (1 John 4:18)

The perfect love of Christ will drive out fear, but sometimes we have to do it afraid.

Courage is doing it afraid.

Here are 6 tips that will help you overcome any self-doubt that creeps in when attempting to share your story…

Tip #1: Don’t share all the details

I’m very open that I had a two year addiction to internet pornography. I’ve written a book all about that topic for Christian women that are struggling with a pornography addiction.

But in that book I don’t share the gory details. I don’t share a bunch of the details of the struggle, the addiction, etc. I share enough that they know I struggled, and I share enough that they know that I’m someone that can be trusted to help them.

So only share what is necessary.

Tip #2: Focus on the hope and healing

Every story has an arc. You have the obstacles, and the ups and downs of a story. Yes, your readers or listeners need to know that you struggled, but you don’t have to camp there very long.

Focus on what happened and what God did in your life. Focus on how you overcame that struggle and how you can help them do the same.

Tip #3: Gather a prayer team

I really encourage you to gather a prayer team who will lift you up to the Father on a regular basis. You can send out a prayer update by email or text. Having trusted prayer warriors in your corner goes a long way in overcoming fear.

Begin asking the Lord to help you brainstorm trusted friends or family members who will keep you in prayer on a weekly or monthly basis.

Tip #4: Consider a counselor or life coach

As you begin writing down some stories from your past, you may find it necessary to talk through some of these issues with a counselor or life coach.

My mom and my sister are both counselors and I talked to them a lot in the process of writing my book Broken Crayons Still Color. It brought up a lot of stuff for me and I needed to talk to someone. That may be something that you need as well.

Tip #5: Use a journal

If you’ve kept journals over the years, this can help you as you write out your story. Or you can use some other types of journaling like your blog posts, newsletters and different things that you may have used over the years; anything that you used to record some of your thoughts and feelings.

If you’ve never journaled in any form, now is a great time to begin. Whether it’s an online blog or a simple notebook, journaling can be a wonderful tool.

Tip #6: Remember your Why and Who

Always remember your WHY and WHO. Why are you sharing your story? Who are you sharing your story with?

Take out a piece of paper and pen and write out these questions...

Who is it that this book or talk is going to be for?
What could be possible when your book is published?
How could it help people?
What could it do?
What is going to be the eternal impact?
What is going to be the impact on people right now?

After answering these questions, place this piece of paper somewhere you’ll see it daily.

Courage is fear that has said its prayers.

Prayer:

Lord, I thank you for helping me overcome my fears. I know all things are possible with You. Help me to develop a deeper intimacy with you in prayer and show me those who I can ask for prayer. I love you. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.