A Mirror Is Harder to Hold

By Alessandra Velsor

“Woe to you, blind guides! You say, ‘If anyone swears by the temple, it means nothing; but anyone who swears by the gold of the temple is bound by that oath.’ You blind fools! Which is greater: the gold, or the temple that makes the gold sacred? You also say, ‘If anyone swears by the altar, it means nothing; but anyone who swears by the gift on the altar is bound by that oath.’ You blind men! Which is greater: the gift, or the altar that makes the gift sacred? Therefore, anyone who swears by the altar swears by it and by everything on it. And anyone who swears by the temple swears by it and by the one who dwells in it. And anyone who swears by heaven swears by God’s throne and by the one who sits on it.”—Matthew 23:16–22 (NIV)

A pinky promise may seem silly, but its origin is nothing to laugh about! This common practice among school-aged children comes from Japan, where it’s called yubikiri—translated into English, it means “finger cut off.” Yikes! In essence, if someone were to break a pinky promise, he or she ought to get their pinky finger cut off.

So, this simple, common-use, worldwide tradition is more serious than it seems. Thankfully, you may not lose your pinky finger in modern times, but you might lose a friend if you break your pinky promise to them.

A similar biblical alternative to making an oath would be to put your hand under someone’s thigh while making a promise (Genesis 47:29). I’m sure there are many more traditions with some interesting (and questionable) meanings and ways to prove how serious we are to keep a commitment. After all, “All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one” (Matthew 5:37 NIV).

If you’re called to be a witness in a trial, you’ll be asked to place your hand on the Bible and “swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth.” Getting married is a serious vow and it’s not only recognized by the law, but it’s most importantly blessed by our Creator Himself!

Jesus is once again calling out the Pharisees with the third woe, or great sorrow, in this chapter. As we keep reading this Gospel, it makes sense why the Pharisees despised Jesus and His teachings. He pointed out their hypocrisy and all the loopholes they created within the Law of God. Essentially, the best way to describe how the Pharisees made oaths is they would pinky promise while finger-crossing behind their backs! Jesus called them “fools,” “vipers,” and “blind guides,” which serves as an oxymoron because it would be impossible for a blind person who can’t see the road to guide or lead another person through it. A swear is a swear, whether you swear by the temple or the gold of the temple.

We can sit here and read this passage while pointing the finger at this stubborn and hypocritical group of religious leaders. I’m sure you can even picture the face of someone you considered a spiritual leader who hurt you or broke a promise to you. But what about you? What about me? The Pharisees were not the first and certainly won’t be the last to do this. We can be just as guilty of using the Lord’s name in vain (Exodus 20:7).

As we grow older, we will likely have a list of people who’ve betrayed our trust and manipulated a situation to make them look above reproach while making us look like the villain of their story. However, where’s the list of the people we’ve failed over time? Our story can seem poetic on paper when we’re the victim or hero and when we seldom take a look in the mirror that exposes our flaws and broken promises.

Today’s passage doesn’t just serve as a rebuke to the Pharisees, it also should painfully reflect a part of us we desperately try to cover up when looking in the mirror in the hopes no one else sees it. Isn’t it much easier to point out the window? A mirror is much harder to hold.

Pause: Reflect on today’s passage while listening to the song “A Mirror Is Harder to Hold” by Jon Foreman.

Practice: Have you recently broken a promise? If so, have you sincerely apologized to that person? If not, reach out and apologize without justifying yourself or trying to make them understand.

Pray: Father God, thank You for exposing my flaws that are hard to recognize when looking in the mirror. Help me be a better friend and follower of Your Son, Jesus Christ. I repent for all the times I’ve used Your name in vain. I’m sorry for the times I’ve failed You and disappointed my brethren and neighbors. Please forgive me, Lord. May I not be discouraged, but keep my eyes on Your Son and the example He set for us. Amen.