Lent Journeyنموونە

DAY 22
Essential loneliness

At the end of Jesus’ earthly existence, He experiences an intense loneliness – nobody understands Him, they reject Him, his friends leave Him, He is humiliated, He suffers physically and goes through spiritual torment, and a helplessness that He himself can do nothing about. But He holds on to one thing: Through this lonely experience, He can fulfill the will of the Father.

Surely God can and will also use loneliness in my own life? I have definitely been lonely before, but do I now have to welcome it into my life?

How do I discern when loneliness is important for my soul?
I think of times when I was lonely – loneliness accompanied by feelings of restlessness, disintegration (as if my life is falling apart) and an emptiness that followed after behaviour that was not beneficial to my life. I think about the loneliness that followed my self-centered and unfaithful behaviour, acting without integrity. During these periods, I started hearing God’s invitation to let go of the loneliness and to change my behaviour.

There is also a different kind of loneliness that I can experience. And like Jesus, it is not because I acted wrongly, but as a result of acting correctly.

In this loneliness I discover more and my inner world expands. I discover how I am more sensitive to others’ pain and how I increasingly realise the magnitude of God’s goodness. Deep in my soul things are happening and I become more and more aware of it. The old saying in the Jewish apocalyptic writings expresses the awakening in my inner world:
Every tear brings the Messiah closer.


EXERCISE
• Today spend time to connect with your own loneliness.
• Do you feel as if there is something (behaviour) that you have to change to move out of the loneliness?
• Is the loneliness that you are experiencing now necessary and good for you?
• Talk to God and thank Him for that.
• And if you feel that this loneliness is necessary for you now, ask God for the strength to persevere and endure it.