Handling Griefنموونە

It Is Okay To Grieve

When someone we love dies, we often feel many different emotions. No, it is not wrong to cry or mourn. The reality that God is in control and it will all work out in the long run doesn’t discount the pain we feel here and now.

God understands how terrible and painful dealing with death can be. We get a good example of how God views death from when Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead.

Jesus shows us that it is ok to grieve when He wept at the grave of Lazarus. He shows us that it is not sinful to feel sorrow. He shows us that intense feeling is not a thing of which we need be ashamed.

Jesus cried like we cry. He shed tears like we shed tears. He was moved like we are moved. Jesus wept, which showed he had a heart. This shows us that we do not serve a God who is unmoved by what happens to us. So don’t be afraid to take your concerns to God.  

Hebrews 4:15 tells us "We don’t have a high priest who can't be touched with the feeling of our infirmities" Jesus is moved in our afflictions. 

Jesus also mourned when his dear friend and cousin, John the Baptist was put to death.

His reactions to both these deaths was different. And we can learn from His experience on how to grieve.

In Matthew 14:13, we find that when Jesus heard the news about John the Baptist’s death, he got on a boat and went to a desolate place. Jesus was grieving. He was heartbroken to hear what happened to John. And Jesus wanted to just spend some time alone, praying and thinking. 

There would be many a time when you would just want to be alone in your grief, thinking through issues and spending time with God and asking Him many questions. This is perfectly okay.

But we read that the crowd when they hear where Jesus was going, travelled by foot and met Jesus on the other side.

Have you ever felt like that? All you want to do is get away and be by yourself and grieve, but the demands of life don't allow it? 

How did Jesus respond to this situation? The Bible says that when He saw the crowd he had compassion on them and immediately got to work healing their sick. Although Jesus grieved the loss of his dear friend, his grief empowered him for ministry. In the midst of his emotional pain, Jesus turned outward instead of inward. Rather than turning in on himself and thinking "woe is me", he turns outward to serve and to love the crowds.

We must be very careful that in our mourning we don't turn our sorrow into self-pity and loathing. Our sorrow empowers us to love and serve others. All that hurt, all those emotions you feel, take them and use them to show compassion on people who desperately need the love of Jesus.

This is often the key to move on in life in the midst of grief. The more we spend time looking inward, we will be stuck in the past. When we begin to look outward and serve others, we move to the future.

Quote: Only when we put away our high-and-dry pictures of who God is and replace them with pictures in which the Word who is God can cry with the world’s crying will we discover what the word ‘God’ really means. -Tom Wright

Prayer: Lord, I thank you that you understand my sorrow. I come to you for help and strength in my grief. Amen