Overcome Porn: The 40 Day Challengeنموونە

When Nick Stumbo first encountered porn at the age of 10, he immediately knew that it was shameful and secretive. Although he confessed his struggles to youth pastors, and later to his girlfriend who eventually became his wife, he never found victory over temptation.

Ten years into ministry and marriage (both seemingly going great), Nick was a 31-year-old senior pastor of a large church. Then, one day, his wife came to him and said that she wanted to separate. She told Nick, “I don’t hate you, but I hate how this makes me feel. I don’t know if this can change, and so I don’t know if I can stay.”

A Need for Recovery

Nick realized his need for recovery. He signed up for a 12-month counseling program through Pure Desire, a ministry that uses small group resources to help people recover from sexual addiction. Nick told his church about his addiction from the pulpit on a Sunday morning. He confessed to the congregation and talked about his journey to freedom. He also asked for the church’s forgiveness and shared his desire and need for help to start similar programs for other men and women struggling in the church. 

He says, “If churches and pastors had support, they could survive. The support from my church was the reason why I knew I could confess and keep my job.”

A Word of Advice

Now known as “the Pornography Pastor,” Nick still speaks openly about the local church and the need for sexual discipleship. He compares the role of a pastor to that of a doorkeeper, saying, “They will open the door to talking about porn or close it. Do you give people the sense that to face their brokenness is a normal and healthy part of the church?”

Nick found freedom through the Gospel applied: not the mere forgiveness of sins, but through the labor of “working out [his] salvation with fear and trembling” (Philippians 2:12). He surrounded himself with men who combatted the lies of pornography with Gospel truths and who helped him retrain his brain. And that gave Nick lasting freedom.

Reflection

• What part of Nick’s story struck you the most?
• Have you noticed your fight against pornography bringing you closer to God? How do you think you can help make the relationship an even closer one?