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Fully Aliveনমুনা

Fully Alive

DAY 3 OF 6

Note to reader—the following is a transcript of the video.

The Wild Adventurer

For those drawn to numb their pain with pleasure.

Have you ever found yourself just going all-in? Like, feasting on life's pleasure, and then suddenly you realize, I'm feasting away, but I'm still starving? I really nailed this one in my life and it destroyed me.

As a young man, I wanted to taste all that life had to offer. All the fun and the laughter and the thrill of coming out the other side of, like, a bold risk. Travel, companionship, and I wanted stories to tell. And that's all that mattered to me. And I got exactly what I wanted. I was chasing after women in my own incredibly bizarre way. And, I thought I was fun to have at parties. I've come to find out that not everyone agreed about that. I took every opportunity to explore the world. And it felt like, it's mine.

I also had a deep need for acceptance. So I wore this mask…and it was…of a carefree wildcard. But I lived with this sad challenge to not let my happy, fun mask that I was wearing slip off, only to reveal what was really going on in my head and in my heart. And I couldn't let everyone see that. It was…that I was a broken man. And I really was.

I felt there could be nothing worse than being exposed in this way. After all, I had lived to ridicule those who couldn’t hack it. So, how could I now be that very person myself? I couldn't let that happen. The party life—it was thrilling. And, it was fun for a good long while. But it didn't make me feel like I expected it to. Chasing that always-vibrant life left me emotionally dull, like a hangover. And, I was face-to-face with all these fears that I was trying to avoid: loneliness, embarrassment, and this real sense of my insignificance.

Shame really began to haunt me. It was like a ghost, and I would drink myself to sleep every night trying to neutralize and numb it away. But one day, along the way, I discovered there was someone who saw me for who I really was. And, He wasn't disgusted by what He saw behind the mask. And He didn't despise me—He loved me despite all the garbage in my life.

And that person was Jesus.

He mercifully took all the wrong behavior of my past, and He put it upon Himself, and He washed it away from me. And He showed me that what I was longing for…what I was longing for—it wasn't wrong. It was just the way I was going about trying to get it that was causing all the problems and all I'd been longing for was right there all along in Him, Jesus.

I am not the same person I was—terrified of being really known and fearful of missing out on the joys of life. God changed my course that day. And I found a lasting joy and a fulfillment in Jesus.

Jesus is offering you a fresh start. And it's not a religious chasing-around—a religious ladder that you have to climb to prove yourself to God. It's…it's different. It's like a dying to your own selfish ways, and a handing over of all of that to God—putting your trust in Him and this better way. If you want to, you can make a bold response to this invitation, this call from God—to you. You can respond right now, today.

Let Jesus be the Lord of your life. He sees you. He knows you. Even the things you try to hide and wish you could hide—He knows already. And He still loves you, right now. That's why He came—to invite you in—a true love and belonging.

If this is the desire of your heart, there is no day like today. Don't harden your heart, now! You can receive Him in this moment.

Pray with me now. Let God hear your voice. And you can just say to Him…

Lord Jesus, I give my life to You now. God, I know You can change my life. I have felt convicted so many times, and I have feared the repercussions of facing it. But now I want to come before You and put my faith in You. I entrust my life to You. Please forgive me. Clean me out for every wrong thing that I've done. Oh God, I turn to You now. Set me on this new path. I follow You, today. I've made my decision. I am Yours, Jesus. Thank You.

Amen.

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About this Plan

Fully Alive

There’s a path that looks right, but in the end, leads to death. Have you ever thought, "How did I end up here? This isn't the life I dreamed of!" Maybe it's time to get off your well-worn path and let God establish a new way forward. Journey with Andrew Palau through six video stories. Find the one your soul longs for and the path of life—Jesus.

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