A Friend in Tough Timesনমুনা

Community is messy

I wish community was less messy. I wish we could join a church with no people problems, sign up for a small group without any awkwardness, and find friends who always see eye to eye. But those wishes won’t come true. Not in this world. Especially not when tragedy strikes.

Many millennia ago, Job had three friends who planned to comfort him after the tragic loss of his children and health. But their first week with Job was messy. “They sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was” (Job 2:13).

Bible commentators aren’t sure what to make of their silence. Some say this was a loving choice since no words would make Job’s grief go away. Others point out that this must have been unbearably awkward. Imagine sitting in the same room with someone for an entire week without a word!

I appreciate this tension because real community is messy. We show up in love, and then we say a less-than-loving thing. We have good intentions when we text, but then we end up being misunderstood. We bring up God’s plans for our pain, but then our friend gets angry at plans that involve so much pain.

It’s messy, but there’s no other type of true community. So show up. Do your best. Ask for God’s forgiveness and their forgiveness when necessary. Bear with one another in love. Do life together. We need each other, even if our community is messy.

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