The Dark Cave: Wisdom for Dark Nights of the Soulনমুনা

Nowhere Else to Go

When Jesus was on the earth, He said and did some things that were really confusing to his followers. At one point, Jesus said, “Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood abides in me, and I in him.” (John 6:56) To his Jewish followers, who took him literally, they must have thought He was talking about cannibalism. For obvious reasons, many started to leave.

Jesus turns to Peter and asks if he is going to leave too. Peter essentially indicates that he has no idea what Jesus is talking about, but he knows He is the Messiah so he can’t leave Him. “Where else will I go?”

If you’ve been walking with Jesus for a while, there’s a good chance you can relate to Peter. God may confuse and frustrate us sometimes, but we’ve seen too much of His goodness to just abandon the journey. But sitting in the discomfort of those seasons of God’s mystery can be really... well, dark.

St. John of the Cross, a Spanish monk, described this experience we all face as “the Dark Night of the Soul.” It can go by all sorts of names: a desert experience, spiritual loneliness, a dry season, feeling abandoned by God. No matter what you call it, it’s a horrible feeling. It’s a time when God feels distant, maybe even cold. It brings some intense emotions to the surface as we wrestle with our beliefs and faith.

There’s a story about Teresa of Avila complaining to God in prayer about her trials and God's seemed absence. In response to her complaints, God replied, “Do not complain, daughter, for it is ever thus that I treat My friends.”

Teresa replied: “Ah, Lord, it is also on that account that Thou hast so few!” She basically says, “If this is how you treat Your friends, no wonder You have so few of them!”

It may feel a little irreverent to say it, but if you’ve followed Christ for a while, you’ve probably been disappointed and disillusioned with Him. You may even have thought He wasn’t very godly at times—leaving you feeling abandoned and betrayed. We call out to him, but He doesn’t answer—at least not in the way we hoped He would. Doubts start to creep in. You start to wonder if this walk of faith is even worth it.

Periods of silence in our walk with God are normal. It’s part of the journey. If you haven’t felt a dark night of separation or confusion with God, there’s a good chance the God you’ve been following is a god you created in your image. Because the true God is full of mystery. The more we know Him, the more we realize just how little we know or understand His ways.

Dark Nights of the Soul aren’t punishment. They’re part of the process. When we understand the importance of the Dark Night of the Soul in the circular pattern of God’s work, it can help us get the most from the season.

Dark Nights tend to come right at the end of a series of challenges and struggles (I prefer to call them the adventure, like in the chart below). In all the stories and movies we love the hero has to face a final battle alone. They emerge as a different, stronger person.

You don’t get spiritually strong when there’s sunshine and unicorns and angels bringing good tidings of great joy all around you. You get spiritually strong when you’re faced with doubt and uncertainty and choose to hold onto truth that is deep inside of you. That’s faith. Faith is holding on to truth even when it seems like the truth isn’t true.

Holding to faith in God’s goodness even in the Dark Cave is like a test before the next level. In the words of A. W. Tozer: “Are you willing to take the test? If you pass, you can expect to be elevated to a new level in the Kingdom. For He brings us through these tests as preparation for greater use in the Kingdom. You must pass the test first.”

When we take a test in school, it has questions and problems that we have to prove we can work through using the truth we’ve internalized on the journey up to this point. Tests reveal whether you really know the material without the teacher feeding you the answers. During a test, the teacher sits in the corner quietly as you prove that you really know the material you’ve been learning. The teacher doesn’t feed you answers. That defeats the purpose.

What if God’s silence in the Dark Cave moments of testing isn’t punishment? What if it’s a sign of His confidence? He believes you’re prepared and ready for the next level. If you start to see God’s silence as His confidence that you’re able to pass the test in front of you, it could lead to a whole new perspective in that silence. Like roots growing strong in the darkness of the soil, the Dark Cave of God’s silence can be your greatest catalyst for growth.

Today, I want you to consider something. If you really believed this time of silence was a sign of God's confidence that you'll pass the test, how would it change your perspective right now?