Hey, There, Girlfriend: Finding Courage for Friendshipনমুনা

You may not feel it today, but relationships are worth the risk. Still, risk-taking doesn’t mean indiscriminate bonding. Risk should be cloaked in wisdom (Ephesians 5:15-17).

Before Paul closes his letter, he informs Timothy of those with him who sends their greetings (2 Timothy 4:21). That seems odd. Where were these individuals in Paul’s dire moments? How does he possess a courageous vulnerability to trust again? We can’t know for sure, but Paul shows he understood some relationships were worth the risk.

He embraces the biblical warning against a haphazard seeking of companionship (Proverbs 13:20). Though he might be lonely, there were a select few on the shortlist worth the risk of future disappointment or abandonment. This is oh so important to note. You and I cannot hope to escape all the ills in relating with others, but we can circumvent toxic relationship trauma using discretion when filling our social calendars.

What should we look for in a friend?

Some people leave you better for being with them (Proverbs 17:17). This is your tribe. Look for those who are reliable (Proverbs 18:24), who are supportive of your joys, and loyal in your defeats (1 Peter 4:8). Pursue women who encourage you as a person (1 Thessalonians 5:11). Yes. There are people like this who will love you.

Pray about who God will send. When you find yourself in social settings, get off your phone. Instead, ask questions like, ‘How did you come to be in this group?’ or ‘What does your family do on X holiday?’ Ask about a favorite quick recipe or how they survived Covid.

Asking questions of people shows you value them, and it allows you an opportunity to learn more and determine if this is a relationship to pursue. Let this experience embolden your faith to believe God for your good in relating with other people.

Building adult friendships requires courage only God provides. Start with what you know by remaining close to Jesus. Remember that hunger for relationship is God’s idea, and He is working His plan for your good. There are people out there who need what you offer. Trust God to equip you and aim your efforts toward what endures. Then ask Him for the grace to become the friend you need.

The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it. 1 Thessalonians 5:24

We hope this plan has been an encouragement. For more Gospel-centered resources from Cheri Strange, visit https://www.sheyearns.com/what-is-next.