Breathing Eden: Conversations With Godনমুনা

The Beginning

Pain can make us blind to—or desperate for—truth. Which is it going to be for her? For us? Come on, girl. Come on.

She sits there. We’ve held each other, shared a hundred cups of coffee and trusted each other with our stories. She is my sister, and she feels lost in this darkness. Because I love her, I feel stuck here too. I want to carry her pain, to relieve it somehow. How do we get to you, God? How do we stand and believe light can shine here, right here?

I wonder.

I wonder—how does God see this? How does he see us? How does he see our stories, our pain, our struggles? How does he see the infidelity, the eating disorder, the abuse, the everyday anxiety that makes it difficult to lift our heads? How does he see our celebration, our worship, our experiences of freedom, hope, joy? How would seeing God’s view of our stories spur healing? Would it grant hope?

No matter our circumstances, we need God’s perspective on them. We need to know how he sees us. Come on, girl, he says. Let my light shine in.

I am desperate for his eyes. I am desperate to see this pain and beauty—with new eyes. I am desperate to believe there is more than what my human frailty can see.

Do you want this too?

Prayer takes a listening—a looking deeper. Real prayer uncovers hope that is impossible to see on our own. God knows the wide-ranging emotions we feel—the cries of pain when we are overwhelmed and alone, the songs of joy when we are captured by his goodness and majesty. But what happens when he unearths the silent prayers we didn’t know we had—of sadness or worship, confession, freedom?

How do our prayers sound to him? How does he see us, really see us, when we share our hearts with him? How does he respond? And how might this change us? I need to know.

Do you need to know this too?

Come listen to women who plead for God to come. Come listen to women rejecting complacency. Come listen to women, in their everyday lives, choosing to seek God’s freedom rather than fear. Come listen to women who just want to speak to God and have him speak back. Come listen to women who just want to praise God and be heard. Father, can I hear you? Will you heal me? How do you see things? Where were you, in the night, when the darkness came and I felt abandoned and alone? You’ve come so many times, will you come again?

You are in these pages. Your mothers and sisters and daughters and neighbors and girlfriends are too. Your prayers are collected here and heard.

Will you listen for God’s response?

Do you want truth?

Do you want light, fresh air, and new things?