Wisdom Dateনমুনা

In the Valley

As the Lord would have it, March 8th was my day off. After Susan and Sandy left for school, I went to our bedroom to ask if Bill was ready for breakfast. He replied, “No, I think I'll sack out a little while longer.” I smiled and nodded. I needed to pay bills, go to the post office, and get my hair cut. When I returned, we could have lunch together.

I went to the kitchen table to write the checks. I was almost finished when I heard loud snoring coming from our bedroom. Looking up, I listened intently for a moment. It stopped then started again. Something about the sound seemed unusual. Concerned, but not unduly alarmed, I headed down the hall to check on him. As I entered our bedroom, Bill took his last breath.

I picked up the bedroom phone five times and couldn't think of “zero for operator.” (There was no 911 service at that time.) Running next door, I banged with both fists on my neighbor's door until her angry face appeared. After a hurried explanation she graciously called for an ambulance and waited for them to arrive, while I raced back to Bill and started mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. After a few minutes, suddenly, I knew to stop. Looking uncertainly about me, the brilliant sunlight streaming through the bedroom window and across the floor arrested my gaze. Somehow, I perceived that Bill’s spirit was a part of that light, and he wanted to go with Jesus. I released him in that moment and have never wished him back.

By late afternoon we had boarded a plane in route to our grieving family in Danville. When we finally arrived at my mother-in-law's, the house was packed with family and friends in the traditional southern way. Entering the front door, we were literally engulfed in their severe grief as they surged forward to embrace us. I was thankful to be able to comfort them despite my empty state. I held them and let them cry, gave assurance, and shared the details of the day’s events again. 

By God’s grace sometime during the evening, a sustaining joy sprang up in me as I chose again the way of thanks in the midst of every circumstance—even this one. 

The Lord has never revealed to me why Bill was healed of alcoholism but not healed of endocarditis. Some things remain a mystery in this life, but I do know that God is good. I have learned that not even death can separate us from the love of God. Today’s Scriptures are about God’s comfort. Let Him tenderly enfold you, dear child.