Breakthrough- Find Beauty in the Breakingনমুনা

DAY 5- Better for Being Broken.

What’s easy to say, is typically hard to live out.

Have you ever said something thing like, “Refine us Lord, have Your way. Make us more like You. Do what You want, take our lives and use us for eternal impact”, maybe during your prayers or through a time of worship?

The truth is, we often don’t have a clue what this really means. To be refined is a process, usually involving the crushing, burning away, or removal of anything impure or unwanted; to make more accurate or useful.

So, really, it’s like singing, “God, bring on the fire to burn away the greedy, selfish parts of me. Crush my pride however You see best and teach me humility by removing earthly success so I can live for eternal gain.” Um…I don’t like that song as much. Do you?

I had a dream one night. I truly believe this was a vision from God. I know…I would have been skeptical, too, before I experienced all that happened next. (It was actually 3 of us that had nearly the exact same dream on the same night but that’s a story for another day.) However, in my vision there was wheat. At the time, I was going through the most painful ministry and life transition. (Actually, l felt like everything was basically falling apart for me, or so it felt. Total crushing moment.) I wondered about this picture of wheat and what God wanted to reveal to me, so I began to study “wheat” in the Bible.  

It would soon prove to be like one of those worship songs, incredibly hard to live out. 

John 12:24 "...unless a kernel of wheat is planted in the soil and dies, it remains alone. But its death will produce many new kernels—a plentiful harvest of new lives."

I could feel the Holy Spirit asking me, "Are you willing to die to what you thought life should be, so that I can replant you in the way that will truly bring new life to the kingdom? Do you trust that through this broken season you will come out a better vessel than before?"

You can look up the 3- stage process of “milling wheat.” The purpose is for it to be broken down so it is better for its intended use. 

> CLEANING and CONDITIONING  

> CRUSHING OR BREAKING  

 > REDUCTION and SIFTING 

It wasn’t until almost two years into my deepest struggle that I finally saw one of the first glimpses of real “beauty.” I was speaking at a church in Knoxville, TN, and sharing a vulnerable part of what I’d recently gone through. I looked out across that room and was struck with what I saw. Tears were streaming down faces. Hands were lifting towards heaven and knees bowing before the Lord in Holy surrender. In that moment, literally on stage, I burst into tears and declared out loud:

 “This moment, right here….This is the first time I can say I am grateful for the pain I endured. I see now that God used what was meant to kill my calling, to bring healing and hope to yours.” 

It was because of the brokenness, loss, and desperation I had experienced that I could relate to these women like never before.  Jesus took me through a process of cleaning, conditioning, and refining, and I can truly say that I am a better vessel now than I was before. I am better for being broken.  

I don’t know what you are going through. I am definitely not saying God “caused it.”  

What I am standing firm on is that God wants to take the ugly, painful, impure parts of our life through a process to be more effective for our intended use and intentional design. 

I want you to hold on to these next few truths in hope they will comfort you as you endure your refining process.      

• God will not waste your pain. One day, as you help others find hope in the exact place you needed it, you will see the beauty.      
• You are not alone. With God’s grace and the help of others, you will get through this. INVITE THEM IN. He is with you every step of the way. He will never, ever leave you stranded.      
• God is still the God of miracles. He still is all-powerful, all-knowing and WANTS to move on your behalf. He cares, He IS moving and is ENOUGH for your every need.      
• His ways are better. He loves you more than you can ever possibly comprehend. By His innate nature, He IS LOVE. He is GOOD. He is FOR YOU.

Trust-fall into the unknown instead of resisting, and then you will learn the invaluable lessons that only come from the refining process.

.One day, if not in this life, you WILL be whole and healed and it will be more than worth it. 

-Nicole

Questions for Reflection or Group Discussion: 

1. In what ways has God and other people met you as you've walked through hard times?

2. What situations (past or present) could God be using in your life to refine you?

3. If you had to pick a phase in the "milling" of wheat process, which would you most relate to as you go through personal refinement?   

DAILY ACTION STEP:

Take some time as a family, couple, or group of friends to share times in your life where you've really struggled but ended up growing for the better through it. Stories around dinner or a fireplace can be inspiring fuel for the soul.