Dealing With Meনমুনা

Help Me, Lord — I Need To Forgive

When I first moved to Latvia, I was insecure, I couldn’t speak Russian and didn’t have any friends — and as a result, I put pressure on my husband Rick. He was building the ministry from the ground up and he couldn’t fill the emotional vacuum that I felt. I harbored unforgiveness and bitterness in my heart, and it tore me down. It tormented my mind and my body. But God set me free and healed my body when I chose to walk in forgiveness. 

We have a need in our marriages for forgiveness; without this tool, I believe marriage cannot be all that God intended. None of us is perfect, and we live in a fallen world. We have a tendency to think about ourselves and not others. We can disappoint each other with our words and actions, so forgiveness is vital in order for marriage to thrive.   

You may say, “I don’t feel like forgiving.” It’s not about feeling like forgiving.  It’s about doing the right thing. Jesus forgave you, and you are to forgive others, including your husband.  

Matthew 6:9-12 says, “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” You see, we owed God a debt, and those who offended us owed us a debt. But God forgave us of our debt, and we need to forgive those who offend us of their debt of offense.

The principle of forgiveness is right there in the Lord’s Prayer. Jesus said, “Pray, therefore, like this…” (Matthew 6:9 AMPC). That’s how important forgiveness is! 

When I fell into the trap of unforgiveness and bitterness, it opened the door for sickness in my body. I suffered panic attacks and torment in my mind. But forgiveness opened the door for the power of God to come into my life and set me and the other person free — in that particular situation, my husband. It is possible to forgive — absolutely possible!

You might say, “But you don’t know what they did to me.” That’s true, but let me tell you what happened to you when the Holy Spirit came to live inside you. Romans 5:5 explains, “Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.”

When you were born again, the very love of God came into your heart. And it’s the love of God that forgives! The same love of God that forgave you is inside your heart. Jesus wouldn’t ask you to forgive if He didn’t give you the equipment to do it. That would be unjust, and He is a just God. He did exactly what He asks you to do: He forgave you. And He gave you the love of God by the Holy Spirit so that 

Confession

I recognize that the love of God is in my heart. Holy Spirit, I acknowledge what Jesus did for me. I have the power to forgive. By faith, I choose to forgive right now. I don’t feel like it, but I choose to forgive. It’s my choice to obey God and agree with the Holy Spirit. And I do that right now. 

Note: If there is abuse in your home, don’t accept that. Forgiveness doesn’t equal acceptance of that wrong behavior. Physical, emotional, and sexual abuse are not acceptable. If abuse is occurring, get professional help and contact your pastor.