Tasting Graceনমুনা

An Invitation into Connection

So much of what I know about life I learned from my mom. She taught me to work hard, be kind, have a sense of humor, and welcome people into my home and heart. Only when I came across my mom’s recipe box years after she’d passed away did I realize she was never a great chef. Somehow I’d just assumed her cooking efforts were a function of limited time and money. But most of Mom’s recipes were from friends, and she’d named them accordingly: Karen’s Company Chicken, Libby’s Dip. She had taken a few cooking classes later in her life once she had the money, but I saw in the three-by-five cards almost no evidence of a sophisticated palate. 

I wonder what would have happened if I’d understood earlier in my life that Mom truly wasn’t an accomplished cook. Would I have pursued a career doing something that I had no genetic disposition or natural talent for? Yet I believe I became the cook she would never be, not in spite of but because of the woman she was.

Maybe you consider yourself an average cook who doesn’t order exotic spices from online purveyors or make meals that look like they came from a Michelin–starred restaurant. Perhaps you face 5:00 p.m. on a Tuesday with a certain amount of dread and then decide to whip up a trusty meat loaf while your children roll their eyes. I’d like to offer some encouragement. Keep cooking. Keep feeding those you love. Keep inviting friends, family, and strangers to your table and serve them the weird Libby Dips of the world. We are all made richer and better and closer to God when we eat one another’s food. Those we welcome to our tables care far more about our welcome than what we offer them on their plates. 

And one more thing: Write down the recipes you use even if you think they’re simple or boring. Your cooking—your legacy—matters more than you know. 

Consider creating some mealtime traditions that celebrate connection. Maybe make it a tradition to have everyone share the high point of their day at the dinner table. Or perhaps it’s a weekly or monthly tradition to host potlucks with friends or families new to the neighborhood. In what ways can you turn your food memories into relationship memories?