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Letting Go of Control

A few months ago, I was finishing up an internship at my church. It was incredible, but I had no idea what was next. I kept asking (sometimes telling) God what was next, and it seemed like He kept answering, but His answer didn’t make sense to me. So, I assumed I wasn’t hearing right. 

I was losing control of what I wanted. God wasn’t following my life plan!

I’m reminded of Jesus’ mom. Can you imagine? Mary didn’t get to decide to be an unmarried pregnant teen. She wasn’t able to decide how her soon-to-be husband would respond knowing he wasn’t the biological father. She couldn’t control the opinions of others, and I’m sure there were opinions.

Finally, I decided to let go of the grip I never really had on my future and hold my plans in open hands lifted to God. Kind of like Mary said—let it be unto me according to Your will. 

I shouldn’t have been surprised, but God didn’t change His answer. He continued to lead me to move to a new city where I had no job, no family, no leads, and no place to live. 

Mary and Joseph made a similar journey to Egypt, except they were running to protect the life of their child, who happened to also be God’s only Son. 

I was so confused, but I just started taking steps to obey. Again, I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I found a place to live, roommates, a job, and I’m now a volunteer leader at church. 

It worked out pretty well for Mary, Joseph, and Jesus too!

Whether it’s location, career, finances, parenting, relationships, or even hobbies I enjoy—as long as I’m in full control, the pieces never seem to fall into place quite right. 

I kept turning, flipping, and trying to cram my little puzzle piece into my chosen spot, but it just wouldn’t fit. God, on the other hand, has the best view of the puzzle. I’m trusting Him with the pieces from now on. Let it be. 

Kaelyn, not in control

Consider: What’s something you’re holding with a tight fist? What’s something that’d be scary to lose? What’s a part of your life where God’s answers don’t make sense to you? What’s your first step for letting go of control?