Jerard & Jovaun: Faith to Faithعينة

In the early years of my walk with God, I thought (at least on a subconscious level, if not overtly) that if I lived perfectly, God would love me and bless me because of my goodness. Although that thinking isn’t totally right, it’s not totally wrong either. I do believe God favors us when we live a life of obedience to Him. After all, the word of God is full of instances in which conditional blessings were a part of God's covenant with Israel (“If you do as I am commanding you, you will be blessed in the city, field,..” etc.). For whatever reason, we humans need incentive to continue on the path of righteousness, the hope of heaven being the ultimate incentive. However, there was something unhealthy about my “need to achieve” attitude when it came to my relationship with God. 

As you might imagine I was setting up an impossible standard for myself. Each time I made a mistake, large or small, it was a devastating experience. I felt that I failed God and that I was worthless. There was a particular area in my life that bothered me most. I fasted and prayed for many years concerning this area and actually this was quite helpful and kept the issue at bay for long stretches. However, I wanted to be done with it once and for all! It became my “thorn in the flesh”. As a recovering perfectionist and overachiever, I wanted to be able to say I conquered it! But the truth is, Jesus conquered it a long time ago. He already knew that despite our best efforts, there would be times when we would fall short. He knew that we would need to be put back together again. 

When we find ourselves in difficult places as a result of sin or just plain despair, we often hesitate to go to God. We may feel like He won't receive us or perhaps He can't or won't help us.  We may also feel that He has forgiven us too many times and we are unworthy of his grace. I would submit to you that our Father longs to restore us. The Word of God declares in 1 John 1:9 that if we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 

Even if you intentionally walked away from God like the Isrealites did so many times, God is able to change His judgement concerning you if you simply turn away from evil and run to Him. He will help you do this. He is eager for things to be well with us. Of course, this grace doesn't give us license to live undisciplined lives, but The Potter will always be there just when we need Him.