The Prodigal's Returnናሙና

Grief

Kim Harmon

[Romans 8:26-28 MSG] Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

There are times when life really kicks you in the gut. On January 10, 2010, I received a call that my brother had been killed. I kept trying to figure out a way to turn back time to make it right. The worst tears came when I returned home much later that night and into the first few hours of the next morning. I cried uncontrollably. There are times in life when we are so overcome by grief that we have no words. We know we need God to fix it. We need God to do something. We do not even know what to ask God to do. Romans 8:26 brings great comfort for it says that even when we do not know what words to pray, the Holy Spirit intervenes and speaks words of prayer to God on our behalf. Even when we do not have the words, God made a way for us to relate to Him, to talk to Him by giving us the Holy Spirit to be the between.

Are you carrying more than you can bear? Do you not have words? Prayer is the beginning. In a quiet moment, give it all to God. Are you in a horrible relationship and do not know what to do? In a quiet moment, give it all to God. Are you looking for a job? In a quiet moment, give it all to God. Are you so angry for so many reasons you do not know where to begin? Find a moment to give it all to God.

There are times when we are so overcome with emotion, we have no words. God does not need your words. He just needs your heart. Give it to Him.

A day after my brother was killed, I found myself physically craving to be at an altar to pray. I have prayed everywhere, driving down the road, by my bed, and sitting in church. For this occasion, I needed to kneel at an altar. We were at my parents’ home with an unlocked church nearby. My husband and I knelt at the altar. I prayed, “God, please be glorified in all this.” My mom said she prayed during those days but had no words. My dad cannot even talk about his prayers without his chin quivering.

Our God wants to bear our burdens. Pray even when the words do not come.

God, I give you my whole heart, with all its hurt, grief, and pain. I lay the weight of the burden I am carrying at Your feet. Heal my broken heart as I move forward in my life. Amen.