Moving Forward in Forgivenessናሙና

Walk in Love

Throughout your marriage, you may be triggered by a past offense. It is easy to bring up the offense in an argument, but that is also the easier way to destroy your marriage. Proverbs 17:9 explains that he who covers and forgives an offense seeks love. On the other hand, repeatedly bringing up the offense “separates intimate friends.” Any past offense that we bring into the present can become a wedge between us and drive us away from our spouse.

How many times have you brought up a past offense in your marriage? Maybe more times than you would like to count. If we’re honest, unhealed trauma can cause us to rehearse past offenses. When we truly forgive, we make a conscious effort to not bring it up anymore. When God forgives us, He doesn't remember our sins (Hebrews 8:12).

Love prospers when a fault is truly forgiven. If we are to maintain a good marriage with one another then we have to be willing to forgive rather than dwelling on the offense. We can have the honor to say that our marriage is healthy, strong, and reflects God’s glory when we truly forgive.

Challenge: The next time you are triggered by a past offense, choose not to bring it up. Instead pray and give it to God. If you still can’t let it go, commit to going to counseling with your spouse to truly work through the offense so you can heal and move forward.

APPLICATION QUESTIONS

1. What offenses are you triggered by? Do you constantly bring it to your spouse's attention?
2. What strategies can you put in place to not bring up the offense when triggered?
3. Ask yourself if you have truly forgiven your spouse. If no, why not?
4. How do you plan to move forward from the offense so your love can prosper?