What Is Real Love? A Guide to 1 Johnናሙና

1 John 5:13-15

13 I have written this to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, so that you may know you have eternal life. 14 And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him. 15 And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for. 1 John 5:13-15 NLT

Pray: Father, I choose to worship you with all that I am. Jesus, I believe you are who you say you are. Thank you for bringing me into the light of your love and granting me eternal life. Holy Spirit, give me confidence and fill me with strength. Help me to live fully devoted to you. In Jesus’ name, amen.

As we near the end of this letter, John reminds us the reason he wrote it: so that those of us who believe in Jesus would be confident that we have eternal life and are members of God’s forever family.

13 I have written this to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, so that you may know you have eternal life. 1 John 5:13 NLT

The message John wrote so long ago is for you too. When you put your faith in Jesus, you were given eternal life. A life of forgiveness and fullness that started the moment you entered the family and continues for all eternity.

Eternal life isn’t something we work to achieve, it’s something we receive the moment we believe. The Apostle Paul says it this way:

16 For I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes—the Jew first and also the Gentile. 17 This Good News tells us how God makes us right in his sight. This is accomplished from start to finish by faith. As the Scriptures say, “It is through faith that a righteous person has life.” Romans 1:16-17 NLT

Our rightness with God starts and ends with faith. He went first. We respond by trusting in Jesus and committing our lives to Him. If you’ve done that, then you don’t have to worry about where you belong or who you are. You belong to God and you are His beloved son and daughter. He is infinitely interested in knowing you and showing you how much He cares for you.

14 And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him. 1 John 5:14 NLT

Dietrich Bonhoeffer once wrote, “Only love gets close enough to know.” The God who is perfect love is close enough to know. He is present with you. He desires to be known by you. That’s why He will never stop pursuing you. He is not distant or detached. He is close and compassionate. So, when you call out to Him, you can be confident that He hears you.

That’s what a good Dad does. He listens to the requests of His kids. He’s done it countless times before, and He will do it countless times more.

Maybe you’ve been disappointed by the people in your life who didn’t take interest in you. Or maybe dismissed the things you cared about. Maybe they downplayed something that was heavy on your heart. Those people and your past experiences are not God. He is good and He is faithful. He loves you and He hears you.

15 And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for. 1 John 5:15 NLT

It might be tempting to read this verse out of context and assume it means that God will quite literally give us everything we ask for. Unfortunately, it’s not an uncommon thing to do. Because at face value, it seems like that is what John is saying. But, we know from experience that God isn’t a genie who grants our every wish and He isn’t like Santa Claus who, as long as we’re nice, gives us whatever we put on our list.

So, how can we interpret these words wisely? We read them in context. Let’s look again at the previous verse.

14 And we are confident that he hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases him. 15 And since we know he hears us when we make our requests, we also know that he will give us what we ask for. 1 John 5:14-15 NLT

John specifies that He is talking about the things that please God. The things that please God are not always the things that please us. We’re broken and messed up people who have disordered desires and misplaced priorities.

Just because we think something is good, doesn’t mean it’s actually good. And just because something may be good for someone else, doesn’t mean it’s actually good for us. This can be a very hard pill to swallow. Because maybe the thing you’ve been praying for is something straight out of the Bible. And God hasn’t given it to you. Instead of sitting idly by while these unanswered prayers produce doubt and disappointment in your relationship with God, let them drive you to develop a deeper understanding of God’s Word.

So, why isn’t God answering your prayers?

Maybe it’s because you have a broken relationship. We can’t be right with God when we are wrong with others. Before God will answer our prayers, He wants us to make peace with whichever of His other kids we’ve got a problem with.

24 I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you’ve received it, it will be yours. 25 But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.” Mark 11:24-25 NLT

Maybe it’s because you have selfish motives. In the Kingdom of God, doing the right thing for the wrong reasons is the wrong thing. God cares about what’s on the inside just as much as He cares about what we do on the outside.

3 And even when you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong—you want only what will give you pleasure. James 4:3 NLT

Maybe it's because we don’t trust God. Without faith, it’s impossible to please God. And John was telling us that God will answer our prayers when what we ask for pleases Him. So how much faith do we need? Not much. In fact, we just need faith the size of a mustard seed, 20 “I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible.” Matthew 17:20 NLT

Or maybe it’s because God has something different. God’s perspective takes eternity into mind. His wisdom encompasses all of creation. His ways are beyond our ability to comprehend. And sometimes, what God wants to do is different from what we want Him to do. No matter what though, we can trust that His something different will always be something better.

Don’t just take our word for it. Jesus experienced this firsthand.

39 He went on a little farther and bowed with his face to the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” Matthew 26:39 NLT

Jesus’ relationships weren’t broken. His motives weren’t selfish. His trust wasn’t lacking. But God had something different. God had something better. What was that better? It was the cross. It was suffering. It was death. That’s different. And it was better. Because it was also you. It was grace. It was salvation. It was new life.

Bring your requests to God. Boldly ask Him for what you want. Do it in faith. And no matter what, trust Him. Because He has your best interests in mind.

Application: Reflect on the different reasons God may not be answering your prayers. Ask Him to show you anything that you may not currently be aware of. If there is something that needs to be addressed, don’t wait on it, take action today. If there’s a broken relationship, fix it. If you’ve got wrong motives, change them. If you’re lacking faith, ask God to help you trust Him. If God has something different, then follow the example of Jesus and submit yourself to the will of the Father.