5 Days to Being Made Newናሙና

becoming // God asks you to follow His plan for your life

Relationship with the Lord

The doctors first suspected I might have something wrong with me in my twenties. Lots of weird neurological symptoms, vertigo, tingling, and something just not quite right when I walked. A barrage of expensive tests came back normal. So I bumbled on for the next two decades, occasionally having flare-ups of “weirdness” while certain folks just assumed I was a hypochondriac.

Then, finally, at age forty-one, I went blind in one eye: a very characteristic, first symptom of multiple sclerosis. My uncle had MS, and he was in a wheelchair by about forty, so I took a deep breath and prepared myself for life to get very, very small.

But that’s not what happened. Not even close. In fact, I have never been so productive as since I received my diagnosis. I’ve written six more books and traveled the United States giving retreats and talks. My monthly column, “Your Heart, His Home,” has been picked up around the country. I’ve traveled abroad many times, including a pilgrimage to the Holy Land. I’ve become an aunt and great-aunt, and a godmother on several happy occasions. I’ve hiked through the mountains in Wyoming and taken a dip in the Sea of Galilee. I’ve been certified as a spiritual director, resulting in hours of incredible conversations with precious souls. I married a spectacular Italian and bought a little house, creating a room just for prayer and writing, a lifelong dream of mine. Life is full, more focused, but not small at all.

It’s true, I’m tired all the time. I sleep more than the average person my age. I can’t feel my feet properly, and I’m clumsier than I used to be, but I find it almost hilarious that God decided to make me more productive, to give my voice a greater reach in the world despite these limitations. Illness is no obstacle to God in making me effective in His kingdom, like virginity was no obstacle to the Incarnation nor death an obstacle to the return of Lazarus.

I was sure that my future would be a burden to those I loved the most. Instead, I get letters from readers who say my books have changed their lives and a husband who loves me more than any other human being has ever loved me.

I wonder sometimes about what Saint Paul is teaching us in this passage to the Philippians in today’s scripture from prison. Maybe it isn’t so much about whether we have or have not, but a reminder to stay focused—not on our circumstances but on the Giver of all good gifts. He wrote, “I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). I want to measure my success by Paul’s standards: the Lord’s will and my cooperation and collaboration with it. Whether that be prison or paradise, in love or loneliness, in sickness or health. The only obstacle to becoming effective in God’s kingdom is me.

If I’m not being effective, I have to ask: Where’s my focus? Where am I putting what limited energy I have? MS has been a gift in that it keeps me completely dependent on God for everything—energy, creativity, opportunities, money to pay the medical bills. So much non-essential kerfuffle has fallen away. I see God using this condition to help me get razor-sharp about serving Him, making every moment count.

Paul made every moment count, even in prison! How are you doing at making every moment count? What are some of the obstacles you face that make you feel incapable? Can you give them to the Lord? Can you lean on Him just a bit more and ask Him to strengthen you and to make up for anything you lack?

Remember, Paul stayed true to his mission—it hadn’t changed because he was in prison. The Father is not fickle in His mission for you or me either. He has a mission for us, and it cannot be robbed by our circumstances. In my Father’s economy, there’s enough money, enough creativity, enough time. More than enough.

In Christ who is my strength, I am enough. And so are you, sister. Let Him prove it to you.

ponder

Think about the times you have clung to your own plan only to have it fall through. Can you relinquish the need to have it all figured out and let God’s plan unfold? What if you could allow His grace to work through you and see what happened? This myth of having the only plan is inaccurate. Set it aside today.

prayer

Good and gracious God, my success is in You and with You and through Your plan for my life. Guide me and help me when I feel stuck or afraid. I ask for Your assistance and grace. Amen.

action

Today, say to yourself: I want to follow God’s plan to become a holy woman.