Grown Up's Guide to Prayerናሙና

Day 1: Not Like That

Prayer

Heavenly Father, when it comes to prayer, show me where I’ve been doing it wrong. Thank you that Jesus shows us how to pray; help me apply his guidance to my prayer life.

Reading

If somebody heard you pray and then suggested you weren’t doing it right, you’d probably be offended. But Jesus has a lot to say about how we’re to pray. In fact, his disciples asked Jesus outright: “Lord, teach us to pray” (Luke 11:1). 

If we listen to how Jesus answered them, most likely we’ll realize: We aren’t praying correctly. But we can be happy about Jesus showing us a better way to pray. That’s because, if we’re honest, few of our prayers get answered unless we count the prayers about things that were probably going to happen anyway.

Perhaps your prayers go something like this: Lord, help me find my car keys, or Lord, help me get a parking space. But your keys were exactly where you left them, and you found a parking space—but so did hundreds of other drivers who didn’t pray. 

Or maybe you pray for a miracle for you or somebody else. Sometimes you might get a yes, but other times . . . nothing. Perhaps it was a series of nothings that convinced you that prayer is a waste of time. 

Maybe you’re wondering: does prayer even work?

As we’re about to learn from Jesus, those kinds of prayers don’t work—at least not the way we want them to. But Jesus prayed all the time, and he taught his followers to pray. His disciples noticed there was something different about Jesus’s prayers. His prayers were intimate and unscripted. They were passionate, intense, and compelling. The disciples finally asked: “Lord, teach us to pray” (Luke 11:1).

To which Jesus may have thought: I thought you’d never ask.

Then, Jesus began telling the disciples how not to pray. He pointed out the hypocrisy of the religious leaders who were praying the wrong way.  

“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others.” (Matthew 6:5)

Hypocrites don’t fool God. He’s not impressed by the public prayers of pretenders. Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full” (Matthew 6:5). The religious leaders wanted attention, and they got it—from the people watching, not God. That’s where their reward began . . . and ended. Jesus continued: “But when you pray go into your room, close the door…” (Matthew 6:6)

In teaching his disciples about prayer, Jesus raised a few questions: Where should we pray? When? How? And why?

First, the where: Jesus said to close the door. You might be thinking: I’m supposed to isolate myself? In my room? Not in church? Not in traffic? Not at the dinner table? Jesus tells us it’s important to pull away, to find a place and time to be alone with God. 

“Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:6) 

According to Jesus, secret prayer is rewarded. There’s that word again—rewarded. But what is our reward? It’s this: We are seen by our Father in heaven. If we believe that’s true—God sees us—how would that change the way we pray? Jesus fills in more blanks.

“And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” (Matthew 6:7–8)

Wait, what? God already knows? So why pray? 

Have you ever wondered that? Jesus wanted the disciples to wrestle with that question. He wants us to ask that question too. 

If you think about it, why are we surprised that God knows what we need before we ask? After all, he’s all-seeing and all-knowing. Nonetheless, many of us reduce prayer to informing God of our needs, wants, and wishes—or the needs, wants, and wishes of others. (But mostly ours!)

If God already knows, why tell him? What are we missing here? Thankfully, Jesus speaks directly to that tension. Stay tuned; tomorrow we’ll hear his answer.

Reflection

Do you pray? Where? When? How? Do you ever wonder: Why pray if God already knows what I need? Have you ever stopped praying because God didn’t answer a prayer the way you wanted him to?