Have you found a BFF kind of love? 💕

There is a really interesting Greek word that translates as love, but it’s a special type: it’s phileo. Phileo love is a BFF (Best Friends Forever) kind of love. It describes a friendship bond that goes deep, very deep. Do you have a friend like this?

The Bible speaks of this level of connection in Proverbs: “A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24, NKJV)

As I think back over my years, I think about the friends who have graced my life. I’m so grateful for them. They’ve made such a huge difference in the great times and the tough times. One friend who particularly impacted me is my buddy Ron. Many years ago, I had an encounter with God on the streets of Manila in the Philippines. As a result, I decided to leave my successful career and accept the leadership of a small church. I was ill-prepared to handle the challenges of this small church with tons of problems, no money, and huge debts. I knew we needed to find our own land and building, but every door seemed to be shut—until Ron volunteered to help me. He’s helped me for over 27 years, and I’ve been there for him, too. Phileo is that type of love. 

The Bible encourages us to “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2, NIV) 

Could it be your time in life to focus on building phileo? Yes, I said building because it takes a truckload of work and skill to build deep, lifelong friendships. I have my own little recipe that could help you start this journey. 

1. Be friendly. “‘Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.’” (John 15:13, NIV) 


2. Be positive. Nobody likes a negative person. 


3. Add value. Express love, appreciation, affirmation, and practical help.


4. Care about the person.


5. Listen carefully with compassion. 

Would you commit to trying these five action steps? God will help you build a few deep BFFs who will enrich your life and add value to others.

Because you’re a miracle.

And I’m your friend, Paul Marc Goulet