Choosing Marriage: 7 Choices For Healthy Relationshipsনমুনা

#RealTalk: Choosing Authenticity

We live in a world in which everyone is out to present their “picture-perfect” self through the rose-colored lens of social media. Our Pinterest-perfect lives, our elegant meals, and our happiest moments. But I’m afraid we’ve become so accustomed to showing our highlight reel to the world around us that we’ve lost the ability to open up about what’s going on behind the scenes. It’s one thing to know about our brokenness, but it’s a whole other thing to learn to share our brokenness with the people we love and trust the most. 

Our secret sins and struggles can come in so many different forms. Maybe they don’t appear in blatant form, like an addiction to pornography or alcohol, but maybe they come more subtly, in the form of our addiction to criticism or judgment. Maybe they sneak into our lives in the form of too much spending, or gossip, or envy. In a way that no one else could see them, but us. 

What are the secret sins, struggles, and battles that we are currently facing? What are the battles we fight in our own spirits and souls? What are our signature sins, the sins we could write our name on because we struggle with them so often? For us to face the darkness within, we must start by calling it out and acknowledging it. We must give it a name, and bring it into the light. Scripture and psychology both agree that in order for there to be healing, our darkness needs to be brought into the light. We must recognize and reveal the darkness in order to replace it with light. Because if left in secret, our struggles become strongholds. 

The one and only way we move our souls from darkness to light is by confessing our sins to Jesus. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). Confessing our sins to the Lord is the only thing that can move us from the darkness to the light, but confessing our sins to others is what keeps us in the light (James 5:16). There is power in choosing authenticity in our closest relationships, and most importantly, in our marriages. 

We’re all broken people, but marriage is an invitation to share in that brokenness. May God give us the strength to be real. 

Question for Reflection: Is there an area of sin or struggle in my life or marriage that I am hiding in the darkness? 

Today’s Prayer: Jesus, You alone know the darkness inside of my heart. Give me the strength to confess, expose, and bring my struggles into the light. I want to be healed by Your grace. Amen.