Christ Wesleyan Church
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Surviving the Summer - Surviving Conflict
1 Peter 3:8-9 NLT
A. Conflicts arise over...
1. Poor communication or miscommunication.
2. Differences in personality.
3. Misunderstandings.
4. Frustrations.
5. Different values.
6. Power struggles.
7. In marriage: money, sex, work, children, chores
8. In families: finances and jobs, sibling rivalry, child discipline, in-laws, and extended family
James 4:1 MSG
B. Wrong ways to handle conflicts*...
Proverbs 29:22 NIV
1. Avoiding.
2. Being defensive.
3. Overgeneralizing.
4. Being right.
5. Mind reading.
6. Not listening.
7. Blame game.
8. Having to win.
9. Character attacks.
10. Stonewalling.
* Elizabeth Scott
"10% of conflicts are due to difference in opinion. 90% are due to wrong tone of voice." - Unknown
Proverbs 28:25 NIV
C. Let love be your guide...
Colossians 3:14 NLT
1. Remember God chose you to be holy, and to represent Him.
Colossians 3:12 NLT
2. Give allowances to others as we all have faults.
Colossians 3:13 NLT
3. Give a gentle answer in response.
Proverbs 15:1 NLT
4. Be ready to forgive those who offend you, before they even ask.
Colossians 3:13 NLT
5. Offer love as it covers a multitude of sins.
Proverbs 10:12 NIV
1 Peter 4:8 NLT
D. Right ways to handle conflicts...
2 Corinthians 7:5 NLT
"When people respond too quickly, they often respond to the wrong issue. Listening helps us focus on the heart of the conflict. When we listen, understand, and respect each other's ideas, we can then find a solution in which both of us are winners." - Dr. Gary Chapman
1. Speak the truth in love.
Ephesians 4:25 NLT
2. Express anger appropriately.
Ephesians 4:26 NIV
Ephesians 4:26 NLT
3. Deal with your anger in a timely manner.
Ephesians 4:26-27 NLT
4. Guard your conversation.
Ephesians 4:29 NLT
5. Make a conscious decision to let go of all emotions or feelings that would harbor the conflict.
Ephesians 4:31 NLT
6. Instead of responding negatively to the situation, determine to demonstrate kindness and sensitivity.
Ephesians 4:32 NLT
7. Instead of increasing your anger by negative self-talk, let forgiveness be your attitude, just as God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:32 NLT