Grace Community Church, Arlington, TX

When Jesus is praying in the Garden of Gethsemane before He goes to the cross, He asks the Father to do three things in us.

He ends His prayer by asking His Father, “that the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.” (Jn 17:26) What Jesus wants most from us is that we would love Him like the Father loves Him.

He also asks the Father earlier in that same prayer that we would be sanctified. Jn 17:17 “Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is truth.” Jesus Himself is the Word and the Way, the
Truth, and the Life. He is praying that we would grow and become more and more like He is in conduct and character.

And the third thing that Jesus prays for us in Jn 17 is “that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me.” (Jn 17:21)

We saw last week the Power of Unity. Today we will see the Problem of Unity. Unity is Hard.
Have you ever wondered why unity in the church is so hard? We see over and over again how the Apostle Paul had to exhort believers to be unified:

He reproves the Corinthians for their “quarrelling” and “divisions” (1 Cor 1:10-11).
He warns the Galatians against the dangers of “rivalries, dissensions, divisions” (Gal 5:20).
He entreats “Euodia and . . . Syntyche [in Philippi] to agree in the Lord” and pleads with others to intervene in their dispute (Phil 4:2).
He instructs the Colossians, “Forgive each other as the Lord has forgiven you” (Col 3:13).
And he exhorts the Ephesians to put away “all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander . . . along with all malice” (Eph 4:29-31).

Why is unity so hard? Well, first and foremost is because of the devil. The word “devil” means “one who separates.” The devil and his minions are always looking for ways to drive a wedge in between believers.

Why? The reason why the devil wants to divide the church is because he heard Jesus say, “A house divided will not stand.” (Matt 12:25) And the devil wants to stop the church from taking more and more ground away from him. And he knows that if he can divide the church, it will lose its power and it will no longer be a threat to him and his kingdom.

The Apostle Paul exhorted us to stand up against the devil’s attacks.

Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, it is against the spiritual powers of darkness. Never forget that. The devil tries to convince us that our struggle is against another human, it is not.

Earlier in the same Epistle, Paul tells the Ephesian believers more specifically how to maintain unity in the church.

In Eph 4:1 Paul urges us Christians "to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called." The focus is not on our worth but on the worth of our calling.

If we go back to chapters 1 through 3, we can catch a glimpse of the calling Paul means.

1:4, God chose us for himself before the world was created.
1:5, he predestined us to be his children—and that means heirs of all our Father owns!
1:7, he sent Christ to atone for all our trespasses.
1:13, he sealed us with his Holy Spirit to preserve us forever.
2:7, he promises to spend an eternity increasing our joy in the immeasurable riches of His grace.
3:10, he has given us the mission as a church to display His wisdom, even to the principalities and powers in the heavenly places.

So, we should live a life worthy of the calling that we have received as those who belong to Christ. In Eph 4:3, the way to lead a life worthy of our calling is to "maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace."

Eph 4:2 tells us how to maintain spiritual unity: with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing forbearance for one another in love,

1. Humility and Gentleness. The knowledge of our high calling should make us feel very lowly. Christian humility is a disposition to think lowly of ourselves and highly of Christ.

The great delight of the lowly Christian is to enjoy the free, unmerited mercy of God. All his longings are satisfied in God. In the meantime, the man of lowliness is the servant of all.

Humility or Lowliness is the prerequisite of patience. Haughty people are not patient. The more highly you think of yourself the more quickly you will think you should be served. But if you have a disposition of lowliness, it won't feel so inappropriate when you are not treated like a dignitary.

If you have seen the majesty of God's holiness, you know your own minuteness and sinfulness, and you don't presume to deserve special treatment.

Another way of describing the results of lowliness is with the term forbearance. Another word for "forbearing" is "enduring." This frees me from needing to think I, or anyone else in the church, am perfect. Perfect people don't need to be endured or forgiven (Col 3:13). But we do, often.

Paul’s counsel here is not how perfect people can live together in unity, but how real, imperfect Grace Community Church folks can maintain the unity of the Spirit, namely, by enduring each other in love.

How do you maintain the unity of the Spirit with other believers instead of becoming hostile and cold? Paul's answer: be lowly in spirit so that you can patiently endure their differences and their sins.

The man or woman of lowliness cannot easily or quickly retaliate when they are wronged. They know that before God they don't deserve anything better. Therefore, let's not be puffed up but lowly and meek. And let's not be impatient or resentful, but long-suffering and forgiving. Then the unity that Christ died to create will become more and more real in our church, and we will not bring any disrepute upon the great God who called us into His kingdom and glory.

We may, at times, find ourselves so vexed by our brothers and sisters, or perhaps so deeply grieved by them, that unity will come only at the cost of painful conversations, and humbling confessions, and extended conflict resolution.

Daily patience, daily bearing with one another — this is the everyday life of God’s glorious church.

Sometimes the destroyers of unity look obvious. They are the agitators, the complainers, the everlasting faultfinders. But far more often, the destruction in a church is much more subtle. We become passive rather than active destroyers. Frustrated by those in our community, we gradually stop trying so hard. We neglect the uncomfortable conversations, leaving others’ sins unaddressed and our own concerns unmentioned.

Instead of patiently bearing with others, we can nurse grievances, replay offenses, and find ways to keep our distance. And that is as much of an enemy of Christian community as fault finders and complainers.
We need not burn bridges in order to weaken the beauty and unity of God’s church; we just need to quietly withdraw. Some destroy by fire, and some by ice — but both can leave a community in ruins.

But that hasn’t been our history, and neither will it be our future if we will…with all humility (lowliness) and gentleness (meekness), with patience, showing forbearance (enduring) for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

And there by walking in a way that is worthy of our calling.