Valley Real Life
Plot Twist | Walking with God in a Dysfunctional Family
Locations & Times
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  • Valley Real Life
    1831 S Barker Rd, Greenacres, WA 99016, USA
    Thursday 6:00 PM
Intro: Life never goes exactly as planned.
We all come from dysfunctional families.
Britannica defines dysfunction as: the condition of having poor and unhealthy behaviors and attitudes within a group of people.
Genesis 29:20-26, 31 NLT

20 So Jacob worked seven years to pay for Rachel. But his love for her was so strong that it seemed to him but a few days.21 Finally, the time came for him to marry her. “I have fulfilled my agreement,” Jacob said to Laban. “Now give me my wife so I can sleep with her.”22 So Laban invited everyone in the neighborhood and prepared a wedding feast.23 But that night, when it was dark, Laban took Leah to Jacob, and he slept with her.24 (Laban had given Leah a servant, Zilpah, to be her maid.)25 But when Jacob woke up in the morning—it was Leah! “What have you done to me?” Jacob raged at Laban. “I worked seven years for Rachel! Why have you tricked me?”26 “It’s not our custom here to marry off a younger daughter ahead of the firstborn,” Laban replied...31 When the LORD saw that Leah was unloved, he enabled her to have children, but Rachel could not conceive.
Genesis 30:1-3, 9, 22 NLT

1 When Rachel saw that she wasn’t having any children for Jacob, she became jealous of her sister. She pleaded with Jacob, “Give me children, or I’ll die!”2 Then Jacob became furious with Rachel. “Am I God?” he asked. “He’s the one who has kept you from having children!”3 Then Rachel told him, “Take my maid, Bilhah, and sleep with her. She will bear children for me, and through her I can have a family, too.” ...9 Meanwhile, Leah realized that she wasn’t getting pregnant anymore, so she took her servant, Zilpah, and gave her to Jacob as a wife... 22 Then God remembered Rachel’s plight and answered her prayers by enabling her to have children.
How do we overcome or lesson the dysfunctional impact we have on others?
We can choose to either be a victim or a victor.
The victim believes because of my upbringing that is the reason I can’t, won’t or never will.
The victim allows the pain of the past to hinder their present and future.
The victor believes there is a different path and plan that God has for me.
To be a victor is going to require grace and forgiveness
Your life matters to God and to others.
Believe that God is real and He is at work in and around us.
Believe that you are critically needed in other peoples lives.
Next Step: How will you choose to move forward in your relationship with God or with another person?
Last Week

How did the past two lessons make you think about your role here at VRL?

Opener

Can you share a story where nothing turned out how you planned it?

Questions

Have you experienced being part of severe dysfunctional family or group or have witnessed either one? What was it that stood out to you that you identified it as dysfunctional?

Have you known anyone that came from generations of bad behavior, yet broke the cycle and started a new life? What was it about that person that allowed them to take that step?

When society defines someone as a victim, why is it we sometimes rally around that person and sometimes we fail to show any empathy? What does that say about how we think of the circumstances of others?

Why do you think it’s so hard to overcome our past and decide not to repeat the sins of our families, role models, or anybody who set an example for us? How does our relationship with God factor into this?

Apply SOAP (Scripture, Observation, Application, Prayer) to:
Galatians 5:1 (NIV)
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
- Read the verses out loud together
- Share your observations
- Discuss Application
- Close in Prayer

Next Steps:
What steps can be taken to show our freedom in Christ?
Additional Next Steps and Upcoming Events below: