Citywide Baptist Church
The disagreement we need to have
Jesus lays out a plan for managing sin in the church in one of the most abused passages of the bible
Locations & Times
Citywide Baptist Church (Mornington)
400 Cambridge Rd, Mornington TAS 7018, Australia
Sunday 10:00 AM
Jesus' vision for the church is clear
Together we identified the things that get in the road of the church being one
Jesus has identified that he cares deeply for "little ones" who have gone astray.
We now turn to a part of the bible that has often been misused by the church and has often been used in examples of spiritual abuse.
Spiritual abuse is a form of emotional and psychological abuse.
It is characterized by a systematic pattern of coercive and controlling behaviour in a religious context.
Spiritual abuse can have a deeply damaging impact on those who experience it.
This abuse may include:
manipulation and exploitation,
enforced accountability,
censorship of decision making,
requirements for secrecy and silence,
coercion to conform, [inability to ask questions]
control through the use of sacred texts or teaching,
requirement of obedience to the abuser,
the suggestion that the abuser has a ‘divine’ position,
isolation as a means of punishment,
and superiority and elitism.
(https://www.christianitytoday.com/scot-mcknight/2020/december/what-is-spiritual-abuse-working-definition.html)
We now turn to a part of the bible that has often been misused by the church and has often been used in examples of spiritual abuse.
Spiritual abuse is a form of emotional and psychological abuse.
It is characterized by a systematic pattern of coercive and controlling behaviour in a religious context.
Spiritual abuse can have a deeply damaging impact on those who experience it.
This abuse may include:
manipulation and exploitation,
enforced accountability,
censorship of decision making,
requirements for secrecy and silence,
coercion to conform, [inability to ask questions]
control through the use of sacred texts or teaching,
requirement of obedience to the abuser,
the suggestion that the abuser has a ‘divine’ position,
isolation as a means of punishment,
and superiority and elitism.
(https://www.christianitytoday.com/scot-mcknight/2020/december/what-is-spiritual-abuse-working-definition.html)
We need to be clear on what Matthew 18:15-17 is, and is not.
Matthew 18:15-20 is an instruction for you as an individual to engage with someone you believe to be acting in a way that is sinful in order to restore them.
It is dealling specifically with an act of sin. This one of three times (out of 29) in the whole book of Matthew where sin is referred to as something you do, rather than something you are.
Matthew 18:15-20 is an instruction for you as an individual to engage with someone you believe to be acting in a way that is sinful in order to restore them.
It is dealling specifically with an act of sin. This one of three times (out of 29) in the whole book of Matthew where sin is referred to as something you do, rather than something you are.
Some manuscripts have the words "against you" after "brother or sister sins". The evidence seems to suggest that this was a later addition probably influenced by what we will talk about in two weeks
It is clear that we are to actively work to restore people who are behaving in ways that take them away from God.
It is clear that we are to actively work to restore people who are behaving in ways that take them away from God.
Matthew 18:15-17 is not a "how to" guide for conflict in the church.
1 Corinthians 13 and 1 Peter 4:8 are more geared to general conflict in the church.
1 Corinthians 13 and 1 Peter 4:8 are more geared to general conflict in the church.
When the church is at its best we are all growing because we are all submitting to the encouragement of each other to become more like Jesus
Matthew 18:15-17 is not a license to confront people outside the church.
While this section of Matthew 18 is not about all conflict in the church, it is an invitation into a form of conflict for the sake of others which is how we grow up together and become mature.
Avoiding the right kinds of conflict is avoiding the kind of sharpening that produces maturity
What is your conflict Managment style?
What is your conflict management style?
https://www.menti.com/cohqmhyi4nThe awkward truth is that we need to be ready to have awkward conversations, for the sake of love.
This conversation is only about our responsibility to those inside the church.
Jesus is clear that this whole process is not for you to express your frustrations but for the sake of the other person, and it should be done in such a way that the minimum number of people necessary should know about it.
If people are continually repeating behaviour they want to change but don't know how, or don't understand why they act like they do, then it is likely they need professional support.
If people are continually repeating behaviour they want to change but don't know how, or don't understand why they act like they do, then it is likely they need professional support.
It seems that one of the ways we create light for the world is by exposing the darkness.
It is clear that at every step of the way, the process is about helping th person "listen".
The purpose of telling it to the church is to help the person listen.
This verse is not a warrant for excommunication, as the instruction to "treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector" is given specifically to the person taking the first initiative to restore the sinner and not to the whole church.
The kind of shunning to which Mt. 18:17 has frequently led cannot be sustained, given Jesus’ image as ‘friend of tax collectors and sinners’ and given the evangelistic concern for those of other nations which Matthew firmly endorses. The person is to be related to now as an outsider, but not as one who must permanently remain outside.
- John Nolland (New International Greek Testament Commentary)
Every step of the way this process respects the choices of everyone involved. If a process is controlling or coercive then it ls spiritual abuse.
The person becomes one of the sheep who has wandered for whom Jesus has just expressed such concern in verse 12.
This verse is not a warrant for excommunication, as the instruction to "treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector" is given specifically to the person taking the first initiative to restore the sinner and not to the whole church.
The kind of shunning to which Mt. 18:17 has frequently led cannot be sustained, given Jesus’ image as ‘friend of tax collectors and sinners’ and given the evangelistic concern for those of other nations which Matthew firmly endorses. The person is to be related to now as an outsider, but not as one who must permanently remain outside.
- John Nolland (New International Greek Testament Commentary)
Every step of the way this process respects the choices of everyone involved. If a process is controlling or coercive then it ls spiritual abuse.
The person becomes one of the sheep who has wandered for whom Jesus has just expressed such concern in verse 12.
Small Group Questions:
1) Read the definition of spiritual abuse. Have you seen or experienced spiritual abuse? How did the church manage it?
2) Matt pointed out that Matthew 18:15-20 has been used for all forms of conflict in the church, which it is not intended for and that 1 Corinthians 13 should be the undergirding framework for conflict. Where have you seen conflict managed well from a place of love?
3) Talk about which is your default conflict style and what that tells you about what it more important to you, goals or people or both or neither.
4) Jesus is clearly calling us into a specific kind of conflict, to help restore people. Have you seen this done well? Is God is asking you to do something like this at the moment?
1) Read the definition of spiritual abuse. Have you seen or experienced spiritual abuse? How did the church manage it?
2) Matt pointed out that Matthew 18:15-20 has been used for all forms of conflict in the church, which it is not intended for and that 1 Corinthians 13 should be the undergirding framework for conflict. Where have you seen conflict managed well from a place of love?
3) Talk about which is your default conflict style and what that tells you about what it more important to you, goals or people or both or neither.
4) Jesus is clearly calling us into a specific kind of conflict, to help restore people. Have you seen this done well? Is God is asking you to do something like this at the moment?